Hi I am nearly bereaved

Hello all I am so very sad things aren’t improving in my life I so miss my darling mum and my sister who both recently died .Today is the 18th anniversary year of my dads death, but alth I have given him some thought today my thoughts soon belong to my mum and sister , I nursed and cared for them both and had little help from the so called professionals always sited COVID as an excuse, even when the crisis was much laser. It’s hard to move on from there haunting deaths which follow me daily /nightly (I get little sleep) from nightmares my GP shows little interest and will only speak to me for about 5 minutes via the telephone. How can I become better??how can be motivated?? Just getting out of bed is an effort alone , I’m told it’s ‘normal’ to be this way?? Thats by others who haven’t been bereaved yet, does anyone else feel the same out there? Yours karen77

Hi @Karen77 - I’m so sorry to read of your loss. It sounds like really horrible circumstances and I’m so sad you had to experience that.

It’s sounding like you’re struggling a bit. And it’s okay to not be okay. Reach out to people on this community- we won’t have all the answers but we’re all suffering in our own ways.

Could you set yourself smaller targets of stuff you want to do day by day. I can only speak for me but doing “to do” lists of everything I have to / want to do that day helps. Although sometimes it’s only mundane things like Hoover, get food, ring dad, finally put them solar lights up it has helped and makes me feel like I’ve accomplished something at least by the end of the day. My hope is in time I’ll no longer need these lists and will just start doing stuff as I did before.

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Thanks Ryan I will try out the list to do! It’s Easter now and both my mum & sister loved their chocs this time last year they weren’t too bad with their cancers they both enjoyed being part of the family, infact I took my sister out to a garden Centre on the Saturday and we enjoyed looking at everything and I bought her a cream tea we sat outside in the nice sunshine.then we visited Mum for a cuppa, so much has changed so quickly it’s hard to reflect on just what happened both gone forever in such a short space of time, now all I can do is visit their graves with flowers and tears. Hope you are okay and coping ? This grief thing is unbearable some days are so dark aren’t they? Thank you for your kind response take care karen77 x

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