How do I accept and live life without her.

I lost my Aunty at the end of February. She was diagnosed with a brain tumour at the beginning of the year and died at the end of February. This compassionate, wonderful person has been there for every stage of my life. From childhood to 54 years old. She was the life and soul of the party and lived EVERY day with fulfilment. My dad died 20 years ago and my aunt was there every step of the way. Ever since then, our family have lost many close members and my aunt was always there to comfort us and keep us strong. Now I find I have no one to keep me strong. I struggled through her death. I struggled through her funeral, but I don’t know how I can live the rest of my life without her.


Hello @Clouis ,

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling fearful of the future without the guidance and support of your Aunt. I’m so sorry to hear about your Aunt and the loss of your Dad and other family members. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,

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Hi @Clouis . I think everyone on here knows how difficult these first few weeks are, all sorts of conflicting thoughts, fears, regrets, doubts and emotions hammering around in our heads. It’s just how it is, and it feels like we have no way to stop it.
But bit by bit the hammering quietens down, and thoughts for your future will begin to surface, but we have to be patient.
One of the first steps I took was to get a pen and paper and made a list how I wanted the rest of my life to be, ie I drafted out the next chapter of the book of my life. It had things in there about such things as do I want to continue living in this house (yes), do I ever want a new wife (no!!!), do I want to live a simple and frugal life (yes), Do I want to sit in pavement cafes and chat to people, making friends (yes). Sell the caravan and do something different on holidays (yes).
Its not something I did overnight, but bit by bit Ive done it. Its given purpose to my next chapter!
Your Aunt would be proud of you.


@Clouis I’m sorry for your loss Clouis. In addition to tykey’s very good advice all I can add is be kind to yourself. Don’t beat yourself up over the bad days, enjoy the good days and remember what a lovely person your Aunt was and how much she must have loved you with all that she did for you.
Best Wishes


Ive just remembered one of President Lincoln’s favourite quotes:

“This Too Will Pass!”

He was right, as he often was.