me too. I am very sorry you had all this happen to you.
It sounds like you had a worse day than even we who lost our soulmates become accustomed to in these days that are all worse than before.
I today spent hours (in the wind and rain but it felt nice and fitting) sitting in the garden just thinking is this really real. WTF can I do. Hours later and no idea because there isn’t anything is there. My husband died in October. Out of desperation tried a counselling line yesterday but they didn’t help.
Confided in a friend via WhatsApp this evening all kinds of worries (life,car,house,money,ashes,family and more) and she said “its been a bad year for everyone, a lot of people didn’t have someone all year due to covid”
No one understands except for people on here.
I hope you can have a nice cup of tea or go to bed or something to just take care in whatever way you can after today’s crash. Having visitors coming is good and bad. Everything is horrible I agree. Sorry no advice but keep telling us more if you feel like it and have the energy.