i have been widowed 27 years and 9 months and i have grieved all of this time. i cant recall when i starting living again? but i think that it may have been after I had gone through the 27th anniversary of my wifes death, i was married for 26 years and 4 months, i wasnt able to get any counselling orsupport, because of my age , as most groups or charities had a minimum age of 60 and i and my wife were both only 45 when she died
earlier this year i underwent both counselling and cognitive behaviour therapy, through the NHS
these therapies and my college education taught me to understand what I have been going through and to learn to move on in my life!!!
i didnt bother to change my home and house for over 20 years, because I basically could not see any point, it was not a home, simply somewhere to rest and hide. i suddenly thought to myself, you have money in the bank and everything you need, plus i had been able to buy my ex motability car
i have been doing voluntary work for over 35 years and it came to me, that instead of helping others to move on in their lives, it was time for me, to do things for myself. i now dont feel guilty about being alive and enjoying myself, which is something i often did ,and found that other bereaved people felt the same?
your comment about me being widowed over 25 years and you only being on your own 7 years is for you long enough , as was the moment your husband died.
e are all different and cope in our own ways and move forward when we can, but theres no hard and fast rules about grief and loss .
i thought many years ago that i maybe over my wife.s death after a few months, but Hell fire , i made a big mistake and it took me several years to even stop feeling lonely all the time
i still feel lonely at times and sometimes think of my home a sim[ply a place to stay and hide
i dont like Christmas, because it brings back sad memories of my wife dying and when it comes to early january, i have her death to cope with.
sending you a friendly hug, to help you when you need support