I lost my husband of nearly 23 years 3 days ago. It was sudden and unexpected. I found him, and me and my youngest daughter who is 19 had to carry out CPR until the paramedics arrived. Unfortunately they couldn’t save him. I can’t eat, sleep, concentrate and I have no idea how I’ll ever cope. Ive got all my family around me and yet I’ve never felt so lonely. I just needed to speak to people who have or are experiencing the same as me, just so I know I will get through this. It is his birthday on the 20th he would have been 48.
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@Nily so sorry you find yourself on this incredibly difficult journey. I feel your pain and know exactly how you are feeling. I lost my partner of 16 years suddenly and unexpectedly at the end of January, he was 49! The beginning of this journey is all consuming and very raw. Take each moment at a time and come here for support. We can’t take away your pain but we will all listen and support you.
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Thank you. My family are amazing, but other than my mum who lost my dad many years ago (buts she got dementia)No one has any idea what it’s like. I feel like I’ve lost half of me. X
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Totally get that, well you have! I have, we all have lost something truly special and difficult to live without. I don’t think anyone will understand unless they have been through it. Unfortunately we all have x
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@Nily im so sorry fo hear what youve gone through, how incredibly awful for you and your daughter to perform cpr on your husband. I lost my hubby last oct suddenly and unexpectedly at age 47. He had collapsed down the road from home whilst on his walk, neighbours performed cpr, then paramedics too. Just witnessing that was horrific and i still have flashbacks and those images in my head.
It is good that you are surrounded and supported by family, be swept up by them.
You will be in shock and disbelief, i also coukdnt eat or sleep, still have problems after 6 months
I echo what @Ali29 says, we sadly understand what your going through and are here to support you.
Sending lots of love
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Thank you. It’s nice talking to people who know what I’m feeling like. He died at home, so I’m doing my best get past the images I have in my head. X
@Nily I so very sorry for your loss and fully understand what you are going through. I list my partner 10 weeks ago. He was found dead at his work by a colleague. I had only spoken to him an hour before. The first few weeks are very raw and all consuming. I think I can mirror what the others have said just take things day by day, hour by hour. I have found this forum is so helpful and comforting as you soon find out that although you have friends and family around you none of them understand the loss of a partner. Xx
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Oh @Nily im so very sorry for your loss. I lost my husband 5 months ago today. It was very sudden and unexpected. No illness, no symptoms, no warning. I look back on those early days with terror and have no idea how I got through but with the support of my wonderful family, I have and I continue to do so. You will no doubt be in complete shock at the moment and all you can do is look after yourself and do exactly what you want to do at any given moment. Sleep all day if that’s all you want to do. I wish I had some words that could ease your pain but I don’t. Just know that we are all here for the same reason and will support and help you, day or night, whenever you need us. Love and strength to you. Jean xx.
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Thank you. X
I’m m so sorry @Nily my husband passed in early February, he had just turned 47 in January. You are not on. Your own x
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@Nily
I’m so sorry for that terrible ordeal and loss.
I lost my wonderful and seemingly fit and well husband nearly a year ago. The shock is truly awful and takes so long to accept that this is real.
I was lucky that I wasn’t the one trying to resuscitate him as he was out playing football when he became Ill.
In case it gives you a glimmer of hope and lighter days ahead, on the whole my life is certainly less painful than it was and I now attend various activities which I do enjoy. I am determined to make my Richard proud of me so I hope to look after all that mattered to him to the best of my ability. Not least of these are our daughters; the older one is 27 and gets married in August, the younger one, 25, has a learning disability and still lives with me. We do have fun together and although I am going through a difficult patch due to anniversaries, both of his death followed shortly afterwards by what would have been our 30th wedding anniversary, I do find things better on a day to day basis.
I hope the images which haunt you will be overtaken by the wonderful images of your life together before that dreadful day.
We can all get through this together.
Love
Karen xxx
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Thank you for you kind words they really do mean a lot. Our eldest daughter gets married in September this year and our middle daughter the following January. It was our middle daughter’s birthday yesterday, and it would have been Lee’s on Thursday. Our 23rd wedding anniversary is next month. A lot of dates so close together that would normally be happy days. Not only was it my daughter’s birthday yesterday, but she also passed her driving theory test. I sobbed after she came off the phone because her dad wasn’t here to celebrate with her. I am determined to make their lives as happy as I can in the future. Right now though, it’s really hard to see those brighter days, but I know they will come eventually, where I can talk happily about our wonderful years together and not cry so much. Thanks again. X
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