Husband died on 23rd June

Very sudden after leaving home. So unexpected. We are in shock and heartbroken.

Sorry for your loss Bev. You have come to the right place. Write how you are feeling on here anytime. They are a great bunch all travelling the same unwanted road with a great big hole in their heart. It is the most hellish journey but don’t do it alone we all understand what you’re going through and are at various stages in our grief journey. I’m 12 weeks into mine and the pain is still raw but roller coaster. Sometimes you’ll feel ok then the monster called grief decides to waken again and you can hardly breathe. I think you will get longer spells of peace as time goes on. Don’t do anything you don’t want to do and don’t make hasty decisions. There is free counselling available on here too. I am so sorry I can’t take your pain away but I can listen anytime you need as will the others. Love and hugs Kate xx

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Hi Bev
Welcome to the club we find ourselves in. My husband died on 10 April after only being diagnosed 3 weeks earlier with pancreatic cancer which had spread to his liver. His death was such a shock and has been devastating. As Katie has said this forum has been so helpful and supportive and has helped me realise I’m not alone and that how I feel emotionally and physically is this horrible thing called ‘grief’.
It’s not going to be much help to you but it does get easier. I can now manage about 3_4 days before the tide comes in and I need to have a good cry and shut myself away. I find it’s like a release and I’m then able to get through the next few days.
My advice is take your time, let the tears flow if you need to and be kind to yourself. I found I had to make some big decisions quite soon which were unexpected but counselling through the hospice has helped me with these.
Take care and we are all here for each other.
Big hugs x

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Hi, thank you so much for your advice and words.
So sorry for your loss.
I am in a auto mode I feel.
John was missing 36hrs then his body recovered. Ongoing report as to how he died.
Our world is shattered.

Bev x

Thank you Katie ,
Wise words from you.
So very recently gone, 23rd June.
I will be thankfully for and support and advice xx

I can’t imagine the devestation this must be causing u, it’s bad enough going thru this under normal circumstances.
I hope being on here can support u a little and bring some comfort.
Big hugs x

I can’t imagine the devestation this must be causing u, it’s bad enough going thru this under normal circumstances.
I hope being on here can support u a little and bring some comfort.
Big hugs x

Thank you so much x

I can’t imagine the devestation this must be causing u, it’s bad enough going thru this under normal circumstances.
I hope being on here can support u a little and bring some comfort.
Big hugs x

Thank you.
It is a living nightmare.

Bev x

Hi Bev, another day have you managed to have a sleep? I went to hospital on my own today, usually Colin would have been with me. I’m not good at going where we both went but today I had no option. I cried like a baby on the coach but you know Bev I don’t care who sees how much I loved him. Have you heard the saying ‘grief is love with nowhere to go’? Perfectly true. Colin went to see his daughter inAustralia on 15 March, she was having her first baby. He was due home on 26 April and died on 20th April so I never saw him again. He was repatriated in a sealed coffin (rules) so I look for him constantly. I have taken to going to a spiritualist church and I find that comforting. I have had 2 messages and it doesn’t matter what my beliefs are it gives me so much hope of seeing him again. I also get some healing while there. Do whatever gets you through. I frequently scream into cushions, shout at the world and cry oceans. I don’t get support from family but have a few wonderful friends. You write when you feel well enough. Love Katie xx

Oh bless you.
I will write soon.

Much love xxx