I am stupid

Just watching the German soap we used to watch together. She asked him: How was your day? He answered: Much better since I am here with you. My reaction: crying again, because that was what we said to each other when he returned home from work. I am really stupid. I thought it will be a better day.

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@Annaessex You’re not stupid, lots of things trigger memories in the bereaved. It shows your deep love for your husband. Don’t think about good & bad days or expect too much. Take each day as it comes. I always read your posts. My Dad died in March & I told my mum about how much you’re struggling. She knows how it feels to lose that life partner & sends her regards. X

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Thank you for your kind words. Sending lots of love and hugs to you and your Mum and to everyone.

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@Annaessex not stupid at all. I was trying on a pair of shoes & his favourite song came on in the shop. Tears were streaming down my face, but it also crossed my mind that it was his way of telling me, “you have enough shoes, don’t buy them!” Well I dud buy them, turns out he would’ve been right, the first time I wore the shoes I got a blister on my toe. That was him saying “serves you right, your old shoes wouldn’t have rubbed!” All sorts of silly things make you cry after such a massive loss. Just try & remember that the memories that make you cry today will one day make you smile!

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Anna don’t be so hard on yourself, you’re not stupid for loving and missing someone.
I don’t know what to think about each day whether it’s good or bad as I’m fine one min and crippled with anxiety and stress the next.
I’ve realised I have to try to take the pressure off myself as it’s making me ill but it’s hard.
I’m so sorry you’re having such a hard time, nothing I say will make it better but we’re all listening, sending you a hug xx

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Thank you for your kind words. Today is a so-and-so day. I prepared already salad for the evening but also cried at breakfast because I prepared his favourite sandwich to eat by myself. And now another dreaded weekend is coming up. Sending lots of love and hugs.

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I hear you, the weekends are very difficult, I’m trying not to think about it as I know I’m making it worse focusing on it. Not really working but I’m trying xx

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