I don’t know if anyone can recognise the feelings I am having?
Before my husbands death I was confident, if he didn’t fancy doing something that I did I’d go to whatever with friends or family including holidays and it was fine.
But now I seem to have become a shadow of the person I was, I went with friends to the theatre but I felt uneasy & a bit panicky, I’ve been to the theatre many times with these friends without my husband but this time I didn’t enjoy it, I just wanted to go home, I didn’t belong.
Family asked me to go on a holiday of a lifetime with them, I said yes then had thoughts like, what if I want to do something and they don’t? What if they want to stay out later then me? What if I get a headache will I be left on my own? In the end I couldn’t seem to push through the fear and backed out, I just feel safe and secure and comfortable at home, like it’s become my sanctuary.
My husband wouldn’t recognise this unconfident scared women I’ve become.
Has anyone else felt like this?