I lost my dad over a year ago and just don’t know how to feel while again. I didn’t have a good relationship with him to begin with but a couple of months before he passed away we were getting to know each other. I feel like I have had the chance to know my dad and my dad to know me ripped away. I avoid conversations about him with my family because it’s too painful for me to think about him; I envy my siblings for having known him longer than me and to have spent more time with him. I feel guilty because I feel numb, after a year I still feel numb. It hurts me deeply that he didn’t see my 18th birthday, that he doesn’t know what universities I’ve applied to, what course I want to do. He’s not here to see my last day of school. I feel cheated by life.
All the feelings ur having are completely normal. Even though u might not think so…its awful that uve lost him when ur so young, but try and focus on the fact that u did get to know him more before he passed. Talk to him, just in ur head or at night, thats what i do. I felt like a robot sometimes, but it helped me to talk to my mum like shes still watching me. As im sure ur dad prob is.x
I lost my Dad a year ago. Its really horrible. Lets be honest…its really horrible and unfair. On my good day however i talk to him and i think that part of him is watching over me. He would be really proud of you going to uni and doing your exams.
Your feelings are natural and normal. Be kind to yourself and find someone you can talk to.
Take care xx