I feel so alone

On the 11th of May this year I was delighted to find out I was pregnant with my partner after only trying for a month. We were both over the moon and soon started talking about getting married before the baby arrived.

13 days later my partner took a massive stroke in front of me and died. He was 32 years old. I went from having everything I ever wanted, My beautiful daughter, a man who adored us and we were adding to our family to not being able to look after myself or my daughter.

I am so broken. I dread the arrival of my baby because I cant see how ill be fit to look after her. I have a great support group around me but I just can’t get out my own head.

This greif is causing me so much pain and I dont know what to do anymore. Im in therapy, under doctors care and am getting support from my local midwife services. I cant carry on like this. I just miss him so much. I grieve the life were ment to have. I grieve for my baby growing up without her dad. I now have nightmares about the night he died and my last memories of him lying there while preforming cpr. I need help


@Jane03 hi I am so very sorry for your loss and the heartbreak you are going through I can feel your pain in your words I know it is so hard but you are carrying your partners child and you will always have a part of him with you your baby is a special gift and I’m sure you will love and adore her and do the best you can for her and tell her all about her dad and share your memories with her take any support you can get and keep posting on here you will get support from people who understand your pain please take care I know it is so hard but you are stronger than you think somehow we keep going for those we love just take one day at a time sending hugs x

life is so cruel, sometimes it seems too much to endure, its true the vivid horror of what we witness especially to someone we love, my husband died in august and my sons and I watched him die in horrific circumstances, my son said it was like a horror film and we’ve all been traumatised especially as we could not help him, the love of our life, the memory has dulled but grief steals everything and leaves nothing, its good that you have support around you at such a vulnerable time, I have found grief poetry helpful and I show the poems to friends so I don’t have to keep saying how I feel even though they can be quite shocking to read but it expresses exactly how it is for me especially ‘No I’m not okay’, sending lots of love and hugs

OMG so sorry for you,so young to go like that.My dear wife was 75 but young at heart and then the dreaded cancer got her and destroyed her and me along with it.Like you I need help or I am going to lose this battle with grief.

That’s the worse thing watching someone you love so dearly suffer in so much pain and there’s nothing you can do, it rips everything away, I am stunned that my life changed so drastically in eight weeks and I’m left with nothing because although I love my sons and grandson so much I cannot feel anything, everything is meaningless without my lovely Lee and what do I do now? I have no direction or desire it’s just emptiness so I keep just getting up each morning in the hope that at some point something will change, I also had dark thoughts at the beginning but deep down I knew it wasn’t the answer and also it would further destroy my family, I keep trying to think of good memories and the fun times even though it’s heartbreaking because it all counts and must mean something, this website has really helped me knowing I’m not alone and I hope you find some comfort too xx


I am feeling everything that you mention,the need to go on,what is the point of it without the one who made your life so wonderful.We must all keep in touch and try to share our grief.Michael