I lost my dad just under a year ago

So I lost my dad in March, He died of a sudden heart attack before going to bed and I didn’t have a chance to say goodbye. It’s getting to a point where I still can’t believe that he isn’t here, and everyday I realise it’s just getting closer to a year. And I dread when it actually does become a year because then it would’ve been a year since my dad died and it still doesn’t feel real.
I don’t really know where else to go or who to talk to because I don’t want my family or friends to think I’m being needy or annoying, especially when they all have stuff going on it their lives too. I tired talking to someone at college but nothing really came of it.
I guess I need a little help or advice about how to keep going, not just in dealing with the loss but also getting motivated to do the things I used to do and find to some sort of normal again. If anyone has any ideas or something I’d really appreciate because everything just feels heavy I guess. If that makes sense…

Welcome ArtiBelle
Firstly let me say how sorry I am you have lost your lovely Dad. You have certainly done the right thing by reaching out to us. There are many beautiful souls in this community all willing to listen.
I too lost my lovely Dad suddenly to a heart attack and I wanted to offer some hope for your future as I lost my Dad 22 years ago. He was my guiding light and my rock, I didn’t know how I was going to live without him.
I will always remember the dread I had of the first anniversary. I had to work that day but really didn’t want to. I took a break in the morning and took a cup of tea outside. I was on my own and I said “Dad…I need to know you’re ok. Please give me a sign, anything”. With that, a funeral procession drove past and the floral arrangement in the hearse spelt ‘Dad’. Was it him or was it a coincidence… I don’t know but I felt such comfort.
I still miss him and can get just as upset but it’s not as painful. I still see him in my dreams every now and then, not often but sometimes.
Nothing in life can prepare us for sudden loss and I wanted to let you know that I feel your pain. The constant longing to go back in time to be there with him when he passed. To say goodbye, to hold his hand. You will feel a bit better as time goes on I promise and you’ll find the anniversaries not as bad because you somehow brace yourself for them.
Do the things you want to in your own time, let your grief in any time you need to don’t push it away. In my experience, friends that haven’t lost a parent don’t seem to understand unfortunately they will one day.
I’m not much help and I wish I could make it all a bit better for you. Here to talk whenever you need to x