I miss him

Hi all. I’m new here. It’s been 24 weeks since my soulmate passed suddenly and unexpectedly at the age of 51. We had been seeing each other for 13 years and we moved in together to give support with caring for my mum, who was suffering with dementia. He was my rock through these tough times. I lost my mother to this awful illness in June 2021. He was there with me every step of the way and, for that, I will be forever grateful. We were finally getting our life back, enjoying quality time together, nights out and I had encouraged him to start gigging again, after putting his music on “the back boiler” to support mum and me.
On January 28th, of this year, he decided to pop out to see a mate and never came home. I was annoyed with him for staying out so late, not realising that the paramedics and air ambulance were fighting to keep him alive.
The knock on the door that night…it was all such a shock…a blur…I couldn’t accept what I was being told! I was driven to the hospital, where on arrival, was taken to the relatives room. Doctor told me that they were still fighting to keep him going and then…the alarms sounded. She made her apologies and rushed off. 20 minutes passed and she returned. He didn’t make it. It turned out that he had suffered 4 arrests in all.
It seemed so unfair.
I find these days so quiet without him strumming his guitar, I miss his voice, his humour, his smile, everything about him. He was a kind and beautiful man and I miss the life and the memories we should’ve had.
I don’t know how to get past this…


It’s 2 month for me, 52 went to Belgium never came home. Sometimes I get through a hour at a time sometimes minutes. I don’t know how we get through but we’ve got this far


I lost my partner the day after you. He was 49 , went on a bike ride and had a cardiac arrest. He was dead in 1 minute and could not be revived. The police told me of his death in our home. We had been together 13 years and 3 months.

So quite similar story. Life is hard and I miss him more every day but I do have some good days in between but yes, the missing him is incredibly hardest bit.

Just wanted to say, I hear you and this is a good place to get support.


@ACAD your story resonates so much to mine.
I lost my partner on 29th January he was 57 and had a heart attack at work.
I was at work when I found out what had happened. I heard my camera door bell go off and saw 2 police officers standing there asking my daughter where I was. That image is one I won’t ever forget.
We had been planning early retirement. Looking at going travelling. He loved his music too and would often just sit strumming his guitar, making up songs. Now the guitar just sits where he left it.
I think the loneliness is the worst part. The missing him and everything we had together. I’m not sure we ever get past that. I think it is that we have to learn how to live with it. Take care x