Hi everyone. I’m new here, and I’m not really sure how to put everything into words.
I lost my husband to suicide in December 16th , and I’m struggling so much to cope with his death. I really miss him. He was my everything, and I miss him more than I can explain.
Some days, I wear his clothes just to feel close to him. I watch his favourite TV show, The Office, because it reminds me of him and makes me feel connected to him somehow.
I wish I could get out of bed and do normal things, but I feel so exhausted. I want my life back, but I don’t know how to get back to the person I was before this happened. I feel stuck in my grief, and I miss my husband terribly…I don’t really know what I need right now. I just know that I’m struggling, I’m exhausted, and I reallymisshim 
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Dear veronicakim I am so sorry to hear about your husband. I hope you have some support from friends and family. It’s important to be able to talk about the pain you are feeling and I hope you find some solace here where everyone understands the pain of a bereavement. You aren’t alone there are many people on this site in a similar situation. My wife died on Christmas day so very close to when your husband died. The pain was unbearable and still is.
I hope you find the strength you need
Wishing you all the best and sending hugs
Tom
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Hello Veronicakim, im sorry for the loss of your husband, I lost my husband in March…I know its so difficult trying to get on with our lives, after the loss of our spouse, ..i was married for 35 years , and to try to navigate life now without him, almost seems impossible 
, but I have to keep moving on, I have 2 children and 2 grandchildren, they are my world..but I do desperately miss my precious husband,..i hope you have family members or close friends you can depend on, we all need help. I hope posting here helps you as well, it has helped me tremendously..take care of yourself and may God strengthen, and comfort you during these sad moments, God bless you 
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Hello Veronicakim ,it’s overpowering the loss we all have I lost my wife Jackie on 21st December after63 years of marriage the pain is all consuming and never ending .as Brandon and Lightmary say you must try to keep in touch with friends and family it’s so important. 7 months on and im no further forward than I was in December .i find constant house work ,cleaning anything to try to have a reason to get up in a morning my children and grandchildren have helped me to keep going ,I fear you will never be the person you were the biggest part of you has been taken away ,the people on this site are all grieving in similar ways and will support you if you reach out to us,hope you can find peace Regards Dave
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Hi there, I also lost my partner to suicide just over three years ago. I havent been on here for a while but the grief has felt very heavy recently. Our daughter was almost 7 months old at the time when she died so ive been a single dad ever since. I’m really sorry for your loss, truly nothing will make you feel better right now, but your life will grow around your grief. It doesnt get smaller or easier but the parts of your life just grow around it. Let yourself be exhausted and let yourself struggle. Here if you ever want a chat.
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Hello Diadhuit, so sorry to hear about your wife,. I lost my husband in march…its been very hard carrying on without him..Just wondering how you’re doing having to raise your child on your own..it must be very hard, especially at the beginning, when she was just a baby,..i pray you’re both doing well..God bless you and your family.