I lost my husband to cancer on the 3rd of September after a 9 month battle, the entire time he was sick I wished we could swap places, I wouldn’t have given it a second though given the opportunity. He had a great career he loved and a wonderful family and friends who adored him, I on the other hand only have a mother and no job or prospects lined up due to mental health struggles. It seems so unfair that someone with so much success and someone who was so loved is gone while I’m here essentially being a waste of space. I feel guilty that it was him and not me.
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Survivors guilt 
I’m sure your husband thought the world of you and would have been devastated if it was you. It is very early days, but hopefully in time you can see that you have the chance to live and honour his life through yours.
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Hi
I lost my
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Hi i lost my wife 6 weeks ago i know how you feel i would of gladly changed places with her
She died of pneumonia at 48 yrs
We would have been married 3 years in october but been together 8 years
Rest assured he loved you very much and carried that love with him and he was stronger because he loved you back !
Hopefully it will get better one day i am hoping so its such a huge change to your life isnt it
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