Im lost

I lost my husband…soulmate…best friend to cancer 5months ago and im struggling more now. His death was traumatic for me…i feel i cant talk about it…its too painful…and i have to just carry on the best i can. Watching someone you love dearly in so much pain and feeling helpless is something that will haunt me. He was only 57 and we didnt quite make our 2nd wedding anniversary. I had never married before and before i met Richard i never wanted to. I met him 4 years ago and was like wow heres my soulmate ive been looking for! And to have him so cruelly snatched away is something i cannot come to terms with. Id just lost my mum and dad when i met him…i feel like im losing everyone around me x

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Cancer is such a cruel disease. Officially my husband didn’t die of cancer but if internal bleeding that they couldn’t stop. It was caused by the cancer. We didn’t know he had it until 8 days before he died. This was a little over 11 weeks ago. So many people on here who have lost their loved ones to cancer. My brother is currently living knowing his wife has terminal ovarian cancer and there is little they can do. It is so hard and lonely. Support will be found from others on this site. We truly know how you feel and what you are suffering. Xx. Sandra

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Sorry you’ve had to join this club. Oh my goodness, that’s just so devastating. Life is cruel. My partner died suddenly at 49, at 57 I was a widow!
It sounds like you’ve been through a lot
A councellor might help you to start opening up and getting the help you need to take steps forward. You’ve had a lot of significant loss in a short space of time. That’s a lot to take on.
Keep reaching out here, there is always someone to help x

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I’m so sorry for your loss. Unless you’ve witnessed a traumatic death no one can truly understand the impact it has. Both my dad and uncles passing was horrendous. My 43 year old husband has terminal cancer and the fear I now have is immense. I really urge you to seek out some counselling to go through those feelings around the death. For me, it helped getting an apology from the hospital that messed up ( my dad) and knowing Sue Ryder were raising a complaint about the care home (uncle).
Xx

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Thankyou…im so sorry what you went through too…i feel counselling might be a step forward…i have so much pain to offload

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Thankyou for your message…i know i will get there its what my husband would have wanted…and im sorry youve had to go through this too…its so cruel x

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I am so very sorry how you have suffered losing your husband from evil cancer. I can totally understand how you feel as my husband also died from this wretched disease.
He passed away 32 weeks ago today but was first diagnosed 12 years ago. He played a lot of tennis and started to feel a lot of pain at the top of his leg. Physiotherapy didn’t help so he had a CT scan which showed a tumour on his pelvic bone, an MRI scan then showed the primary cancer was on his kidney. He had the kidney removed and three sessions of radiotherapy on his pelvic bone over the next few years.
We knew that ultimately the radiotherapy wouldn’t work and so his mobility worsened in 2019, although he managed pretty well until 2021 when he was diagnosed with advanced prostate cancer which should have been picked up with regular scans and blood tests he was having. Until he passed away we were on a roller coaster of hospital stays, tests, drugs - a total nightmare. I looked after him at home for 16 weeks with help from our local hospice, towards the end of his life, until he went into a nursing home for three weeks.
I am trying to be positive, go out regularly but the pain and loss is always there, he was a wonderful husband and I hate living alone without him. However much I try, I will never forget the heartache cancer caused us, although we managed to salvage some years of almost normality, the inevitability of what would ultimately happen was always hanging over us, with regular scans, always stressed when waiting for results, We couldn’t have holidays overseas because we couldn’t get travel insurance.
I am sorry you also lost parents earlier on. Life can be so cruel.
Sending my best wishes, just live day to day as positively as you can, remember love never dies, he’s there in your heart. x

Thankyou for your message…im sorry you went through this too…i also have an oustanding complaint about his hospital treatment…im trying to remember all the good times we had too…it makes me smile so thats a good thing right? X

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Thankyou for your lovely message! Im really sorry you had to go through this too…it will scar me for life…but i will get there! I have 2 wonderful children and 2 grandchildren that keep me going!

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Aw … thats so sad … so sorry for you … my husband eas onlly 60 and thats too young these days … xxx

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