Its not real

Its a quick question really. Its almost 3 months since my sister died unexpectedly. Despite now being able to count the time since her death in months, for a significant amount of time, it doesnt feel real. It still feels like it cant have happened. 3 months after my dad died i knew for a fact it was real. I was in no doubt. But this time round, it feels unreal. Id be interested on other experiences as i feel like im going a bit nuts.

Hi Vivmt,
No you’re not going nuts…Both my parents died some years ago and that is how the order of life should be. The older generation first and if they had had a good life and hopefully a long one It is accepted.
What you are going through is very different as it’s your loved sister and it wont feel real as you said it was unexpected and it shouldn’t have happened and you must be wondering why.
I’m so sorry for your loss and keep posting as I’m sure there on others on this caring site you have lost siblings.
Hope this makes some sense for you.
Love Jenny

So sorry for your loss. I think you’re definitely in shock. Losing someone too soon is unfathomable x

When i think about shock i think about how i was the first few days after she died. I couldnt eat, slept constantly, i felt nothing after the first couple of hours, thats what i think of when i think of shock. I didnt anticipate shock in any form continuing for 3 months.
I think it doesnt help i feel like im in limbo. My work have referred me to occupational health at my request over a month ago and ive heard nothing. The gp referred me to the listening service about 6 weeks ago and ive heard nothing. Meantime its all just whirling around in my head having not spoken about it at all. Im chasing my boss to chase occupational health and im chasing my dr but im in limbo. Time is happening around me while im standing still if that makes any sense at all.

I understand how you feel, my husband died 3 weeks ago and it doesn’t seem real. He was 54 and I’m still half surprised he’s not here even though I miss him terribly. It’s surreal, it must be our brains trying to make sense of something so shocking? Sending you love xx