Ive lost my mum

I just dont know how to cope, im a full time mum to my 3 young children, i lost my mum just over 2 weeks ago and i dont know what to.do, she left behind 10 children, im only 29 myself and im completley broken, we lost her very suddenly to suicide, she had been in a very abusive relationship for 17 years she was finally leaving him, she was only 54 she was going to move in with her 86 year old mother the next day, told everyone she coulsnt wait to see us and now she has gone , we have been asked if we want to see her i just dont know what to do, id like to say goodbye but i dont know if i can see her like that :broken_heart: , she had 10 children, 8 grandchildren and a mother who loves her so much, im so scared we are going to loose her too, i put a smile around my children but when its just me i cant.stop crying , how do i get through this someome please shed some light and tell me it gets easier,

Aww Char1933
My heart goes out to you.And you are so young yourself.Your three children need you now more than ever so keep as strong as you can.Your mum would want you to carry on and like so many of us on here we know how hard that is to do bec we are going through losing our mum’s ourselves.Mine passed away Dec 30th. The shock you are dealing with is awful.I will check to see how you are in a day or two ok
Deborah x

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Char1933
So sorry to hear this and she was so close to getting away from that relationship. I found my mum at home and I was going to see her to get the image of how I found her out my head but I couldn’t do it. I just closed my eyes and remembered how she was on Christmas day when she left saying ‘I’ve had a lovely day hen’ and her grandson walked her home. Don’t put yourself under pressure if you don’t want to but if you feel it will give you comfort then do it. There is no right or wrong it’s a personal thing.
Your kids will give you the strength you didn’t know you had, my son does for me and he was such a nanas boy. I do have my moments though as grief hits you when you don’t expect it. I didn’t have a good day yesterday but feel a bit better today but that may change later.
Look after yourself and your kids.
Valda xx

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Thank u every one for your kind words, and im so sorry for your losses :broken_heart:, i found today really hard it was my sons 10th birthday, i didnt.wanna celebrate i knew i had to because its my little.boy but it was hard painting a happy face, my husband trys to help but he doesnt understand, tells me i.need to be strong.for my kids ans i.know that but its.so hard :broken_heart: i.get up and sit on the sofa dont move stare into space, the day just goes then im back to square one. i feel like i.have a gaping hole in my heart that will never be filled, my chest actually hurts, everyone keeps asking me if im ok or how you holding up i say im fine but really im dying. Inside, and then comes the worry for other family memebers like my 86 year old nan who.is so broken without her daughter, i just dont.know what to do or how to make any of this better for anyone including myself :broken_heart::pleading_face:

I don’t know about you but morning and night worse as you realise they were not with you in the day and in the morning you realise that it’s another day without them. Sorry maybe I am not being much help and yes you say to folk I’m doing ok but your not as your heart is broken and you just want to see them again. I saw my friend today who also lost her mum not so long ago and she got it when I was talking to her. She said unless you have went through what we have people don’t get what we are going through and it’s not easy and I could be the emotional mess that I am and she got it. She still has moments months down the line where it hits her. It’s still very raw for me my mum was there just about every day for me and my son. You do what helps you get through this painful process, sending you hugs. Valda xx

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