Kick a man when he's down.

I was already struggling after my partner’s death five weeks ago. Yesterday the doctor told me that tests show that I may have multiple myeloma (bone cancer). I already have prostate cancer. To have lost my partner and possibly having two different sorts of cancer at the same time is too much. I feel that I am being kicked while I am down.
I am not religious, but I feel that if there should be a God, then he would not be the sort of person I would want to know.

Malcolm. Sometimes it truly makes you wonder how life can change for the worse in such a drastic way when you are simply keeping your head down and going about your daily business doesn’t it. Especially following your previous trauma’s. I won’t say “keep positive” as wishful thinking changes nothing, (I find) but I do so hope you have a positive resolution.

Malcolm sometimes life can be so cruel and you’ve certainly got a lot to deal with. I’m hoping that you find the strength to deal with this. I am a Christian but death and suffering is hard to understand. I think it is an imperfect world and hold on to our loved ones being in a better place without suffering or pain.
Best wishes xx


Dear Malcolm I am so sorry to read this news. I cannot imagine how you are feeling especially so soon after your sad loss. There are no words that I can say that will help you but please know that we on here are sending love and thinking of you.


Malcolm, can I just add my name to all the thoughts and good wishes going out to you, and send a big man hug.

Oh Malcolm,
I am so sorry to hear this. I don’t know what to say apart from you are in my thoughts.

Another one Malcolm sending you love and best wishes. You sound so lovely from your posts, caring and thoughtful. You have lots of friends on this forum who are all rooting for you.


So very very sorry to hear this. This life is truly cruel and torments us. I wish I could think of something to say but all the words sound trite. I send you my kindest thoughts and prayers for strength to get through these dreadful days and hope upon hope for better news for you.

Much love xx

I’m so sorry to hear this news. It is so awful and unfair how much you have been through in a short space of time.

Macmillan Cancer Support can offer lots of practical and emotional support with cancer - you can call them on 0808 808 0000.

I wish you the best with whatever tests you are having - please let us know the outcome and keep posting here if you find that it helps.

So sorry to hear this Malcolm, I too don’t know what else to say,hope you have lots of family and friends supporting you, and that they shower you with lots of love and kisses every single day, i send you a huge hug

Thanks to all of you, my friends. I say this because although I have never met any of you, I know that you feel for me, as I feel for you with your various troubles. What a pity that we cannot meet, and give each other real hugs instead of virtual ones. Bless you, all of you.

Hi Zahn, Life is cruel, but still I believe that God is good and I know that except for him and his love I wouldn’t be here now. I’d have taken my own life as it’s too hard to live without my husband. I dont know why my husband had to die as he did and one day perhaps I will understand. It’s not for me to understand, only to accept - which is a very hard and very painful thing to do. As you say, we live in an imperfect world but heaven will be perfect and there are no tears and no separations and no pain there.

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Hi Malcolm, I’m so sorry you’ve got this on top of losing your partner. It really isn’t fair, but life isn’t fair and no one said it had to be. I can’t think of anything to say that can comfort you but I am a Christian and I will pray that somehow you will get through this. I know that there is a God because he has helped me many times in my life and though a bad thing has happened to me, I know he isn’t going to just abandon me now. I know that without God in my life, I wouldn’t be here now and I’d not have got through the last year - or even through today which was a real bad day for me, though perhaps nothing to compare with the horrible day you must have had yesterday when the doctor delivered that awful news to you. I believe that there is good and evil in the world. The world is out of balance because whilst God is the force for good, there is also a force for evil that constantly wars against the good, a force for destruction that wreaks havoc on humanity, and on this world, perverting our course from what God originally desired. But one day the evil will be done away with, and God who is love himself, will reign supreme and there will be no more tears, no more crying, no more pain. This is what I believe. I’m looking to the day when I see my husband again, in heaven.

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So sorry to hear this Malcolm.

Sending much love xx

I am totally sorry Malcolm for your news. Life continues to knock us down and possibly life is hell on earth. I am sending massive hugs and my faith has not only been knocked but has made me think. What can I say. Im sorry for your loss xx