Life alone

Your heart and life is shattered into a million pieces when you lose a loved one.Coping day to day can be a struggle and the loneliness is empty and cold, and the future looks bleak.
At the start its the anger hurt sadness, raw emotion with what seems like forever never ceasing.You look at the world and it hasn’t changed ,you wonder why people are laughing and getting on with their lives, why arent they feeling like me?that was you before can you ever be the same again.
People are kind but they move on with their own lives, snd eventually they forget not meaning to but thats life.
Unless you’ve been through it you don’t understand.
I always say grief is like a box at the start its wide open and you cant close it, as time passes you can close it bit by bit.
You peek in it all floods back but you can control it now.

I am at the start of another sad loss my husband this time and after 16 months my box is still open but not as raw although hes in my thoughts most of every day sometimes tears sometimes smiles.The process of loss :broken_heart:
Take care x

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@Fozzie07
What a good way to describe it.
A nutritionist I see told me she wants to see me at 11 months as she said that can be a hard time. That combined with, (I think it was @Lonely ) someone saying she did too much in the first year and it hit hard afterwards I am wary.

Sending love xxx

Hi

How long since you lost your loved one? Was it very sudden ?

Yeah I think its a balance I had a very busy house to nothing literally over night.
Youngest went to uni halls first year eldest went back to uni and her flat and Andrew gone after 7 weeks of being told he was dying to gone.I looked after him at home with the help of the girls and nurses.
So left alone which was totally horrendous.
I eventually went back to work had to otherwise I would have gone mad.
Take care x

@Fozzie07
Yes, very sudden. My 60 year old, very slim, fit and apparently well husband went out one Monday night in April last year to play football as usual and never came home. He had suffered a coronary embolus and died on his way to hospital with a fellow player who was a Dr.
A police officer came to the door at around 11.30 pm to tell me.

Hi

Thats like my dad 59,at work exactly the same nothing they could have done either.Its so shocking, nothing to prepare you.He died just after my sister drowned and was never found think it was a broken heart,although his family had a strong history of heart issues.
Andrew was 7 weeks dying in front of us,we had some closure so we are thankful for that but it was horrendous.
Do you have any family for support? You must still be in a daze wondering if its real, expecting him to walk back in the house.
He was fit too and certainly not old,so even more shocking when you think all is good life is cruel.

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Oooh @Fozzie07 how awful for you all about your sister.
7 weeks is not much time to prepare so still such a shock for you. Not that there is any easy way to lose the person you adore so much. Those who watch them deteriorate and know the inevitable is coming have such an unbearable burden.
My heart goes out to all.
xxx

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With the horror of my dad and sister Andrew was there supporting me and then him going well I was alone although I had my daughters they had their own grief to work through.
We were a very tight family unit, the girls rarely speak about his illness my youngest was so close to her dad two
peas in a pod she has followed him at uni studying law too.She really struggles at times although she never speaks to me about it.My eldest has a supportive boyfriend who is like a son to us so hes been great.
No it was a relief when andrew passed and he was out of the pain and at peace and we could forget the shell if a man he had become and remember the strong smart person he really was

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Aw … … yeh my husband was 60 too !! Too young isnt it :frowning: xxx

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@Fozzie07
My older daughter in particular was extremely close to her Dad and has his Sharon wit.
My younger daughter processes things very differently and is not too upset a lot of the time. She only lives in the moment so doesn’t worry about what is to come in the way we do.