life on pause after my mum died

hi my mum died 4 years ago and I don’t think I have ever dealt with it. My best friends mum died last month and it hit me hard, not that her mum died but how much I miss my mum.

Although since she died I have moved out with my boyfriend, this was originally planned for the month my mum died, however I stayed with my dad for another 6 months before I moved out, we have got engaged, and although I want to get married it upsets me to think my mum will never see it like she did my sister’s wedding. My sister also has 2 children and again I know if I was to ever have kids I wouldn’t have my mum to help me like my sister did.

I feel sometimes that a lot of me died when she did. I am not 37 nearly 38 and feel that my life will not and can not move on.

Dear ford1981, I am so sorry for the way you are feeling. Mum’s are so special. After my mum had passed more than 6 years ago now, I wrote a journal. I now do one to my husband who passed away in June 2017. I write as if I am chatting to him. I stick things in such as photos, newspaper clippings etc. It brings me great comfort and it’s become very special to me.

Perhaps a journal is something you could think about doing. Chat to your mum in it and when you get married and have kids, you could stick photos in. It could become your very special book, just between you and your mum.

Sending love xx

Hi…I know how you feel. My mum died just over 2 years ago. Life is awful without her I still cry a lot… certain events that have happened in my life are not the same because I can’t tell my mum… I hate the fact that my mum doesn’t know I am buying a house and other different things. I miss her so much. .shows what lovely mums we had …x

Hi ford1981,
My mum passed away just over a year ago just before my 20th Birthday, and I still don’t think I have quite wrapped my head around it. I will go about my normal day and suddenly be hit by “she won’t be at my graduation” or “my kids will never meet their Nannie” and it feels like I’m being punched in the gut. Or even some times I forget and pick up my phone to ask her how long I should cook a chicken for… Sometimes a girl just needs her Mum x