Living alone

I became a widow 3 weeks ago , we have been married 33 years and have two wonderful children that keep me going they have been a fantastic support . I have found it very difficult these past couple of weeks sorting out my husbands estate and things. I love northern soul music and find it very uplifting especially in these very difficult times we are all going through with lockdowns etc. I am going back to work in October just to get some kind of normality in my life. My husband passed away very suddenly and hadn’t been poorly beforehand so it came as a total shock to me and the family . After lockdown I wonder if I will ever return back to the northern soul dancing without him by my side I suppose only time will tell. I do find mixing with others quite easy and feel I’m quite sociable . I find the evenings hard what do others do to fill your evenings especially now the nights are drawing in

Hi,

I’m sorry for your loss, I’m the same I lost my husband suddenly in may, total shock etc.

I find the evenings the hardest once I have put the kids to bed. I had to change my living room round and decorate as was finding it hard sitting in the room I used to share with him. I try and get into something on the telly, or I have been reading. Which one helps me feel tired but also switches my mind off. X

I understand at least some part I think. My partner of 22 years died suddenly and unexpectedly this year. I now live alone and don’t work after I was let go when I had a medical accident leaving me with condtant neurological pain. That challenged our relationship sadly. Otherwise we would probably have had a child. In the evening I listen to radio 4 or 5. And read information on the traumas I am struggling to seek remedies to aid with eventual closure. I hope you find some help coming here. Love your Northern Soul passion, I dont know much about the lifestyle but expect you and your husband had great times within the music etc. I wish you healing.

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My kids are grown up and left home with families of their own but they are still in regular contact more than before . I have changed my room around and felt it helped . I have a book which I’m half way through but at the moment I’m not retaining what I have read . Thank you for your reply and ideas for the evenings . Take care and stay safe x

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Thank you for your lovely reply. Its good that you have found changing the room around helped. I am in the middle of changing around. I have so much paperwork but am trying to sort it. Your not retaining the book reading is my experience. Even going into a room and not remembering why I went or what I wanted is happening too. I am glad your grown children call more. I have siblings and my Dad. Sadly Mum passed mayb about 10 years before she would have. She had a colonoscopy which was unsuccessful and gave her complete disability from able bodiedness overnight. I cared for her and it took from May til December when she couldn’t fightback more. very sad. Take care and stay safe too x

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