Will try it.Didnt think it would be any good seen as he had his flat where I frequently stayed but I live with parents
Dear Sue
I understand completely your feelings as I am also alone and lonely. My beloved husband died on 30 July last year after being ill for a month. I never imagined the sheer devastation losing him would cause. We did everything together, I loved him and we were happy. That has all gone, my life is over and I am lost. Family and friends have been kind and supportive but no one and nothing fills the place in my heart and my life that John held.
Please know that others are also going through the hell that bereavement causes.
Sending comfort and strength Barbara
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My Mum died in hospital but I speak to her at home. I speak to an empty room. It does make me cry, but it gets my emotions out and I’m saying what needs to be said. I sometimes read my hand out when I’m in bed and imagine her hand is touching mine.
My ex-neighbour went to see Sally Morgan and she was very disappointed, for one thing there were too many people there.
To be fair, Jackie, would it have made any difference to the outcome, if SM had seen your beloved Richard’s death. I believe that you would be completely devastated if you had known that you were going to lose him. I would have been if someone had told me when my Stan was going to die.
I do hope that you have a better day today,
Love
MaryL
Me too I bet my mate keeps saying for goodness sake will you shut up woman I’m doing my stuff appear I’ll come and get you when your time is up LOL
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morning, couldn’t help but respond to your post, when our loved ones pass to the spirit world they don’t leave us, they are by our side no matter where we are on the earth plane. it may help you if you bought a journal, perhaps one with a cover that you really like, then each day write in it as though you were talking to him, you’ll be surprised how much this will help you, and in time you may receive messages back I always put the date first, then as time progresses you can look back over previous writings and you will see how much this has helped you. your boyfriend will send you subtle messages, I have believed in the spirit world and the power of spirit since a very young age, please feel free to message me if you’d like to know more and I shall try to help you through this difficult journey. it was 20 months yesterday since my husband passed away suddenly and only 38 hours after the doctors told me they’d found a malignancy, he didn’t know thankfully, and there’s not a day I don’t shed a tear, some days it’s buckets.
there is no right or wrong way to grieve, we all grieve in a way that is personal to us, there’s no quick fix nor a time limit. we are now forced to live a different life, we cannot continue living the life we had with our husbands/wives/partners as that life is no more, we don’t want a new life, we now live a different life, different to what we had, different because we’re having to carve out a different way in which we continue to live yet bringing to this different life the memories and love from our lives with our loved ones including the disagreements because they too are a part of our memories. please try to focus on the loving lovely times you spent with your boyfriend and hold those memories first and foremost close to your heart.
you are amongst friends here, only those who have lost their husbands/wives/partners all understand what you are going through. as I said earlier, grief is personal to each and everyone of us, and it is only if you have suffered a loss as you and everyone on ‘lost a partner’ do you truly understand what we’re going through. there is a book I found helpful and still do, On Grief and Grieving by Elizabeth kubhler-Ross it is available on Amazon, and it explains a great deal about the stages of grief, the misconceptions and more besides.
take each day one step at a time
hope today is an improvement on yesterday and tomorrow is an improvement on today
blessings
Jen☆
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Dear Jen,
Thank you for that wonderful post, I believe in the Spirit World I always have done. Today, my lovely husband has been at the side of me, I just know, | felt such comfort it only lasted a few seconds but it is very reassuring to know that he is watching over me.
Thanks again, may I pm you as I would really like to know more.
Love
MaryL
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sue-h,
It is good to have a laugh, I laughed at your message, our senses of humour haven’t died.
We cope Sue because we have to. I couldn’t agree more with everything that Jen (Day at a time) has said. Wise words indeed.
Many of us write a journal, I write every day to my husband. Sometime I feel sorry for myself and have a moan and can imagine him saying, “whats all the fuss about, get on with it”. Sometimes I rant and rave at him for leaving me all alone. I can recommend writing, you can pour your heart out.
I never rushed out to meet people, I decided to learn to like my own company. However I did carry on with our hobbies and interests and this gave me all the company I could cope with. I didn’t want to join clubs etc I just let life come to me and 14 months along I find that it is happening and I am coping with a great deal more than I could have a year ago. No amount of company is going to take away the pain and being alone. By being alone I mean that the people that were so much a part of our life are not there with us. But have they really gone. I had never given the spirit world a thought before but after Brian died he came back to me so many times that I now feel very differently about the subject. He showed me where things were that I had no knowledge about. When I worried about something he would come and give me an answer. I have even witnessed him in my dining room and going through a cupboard of his that I had just sorted out. He would have hated me going through these things. I feel he had come to check up what I had been up to and he even noticed changes I had made in that room. I have clearly heard his voice when wide awake. However I do feel that Brian is backing off now and leaving me to cope more on my own as I am managing to do so many more things with my life that was so difficult a year ago. I still talk to him and this morning as I stood on the seafront which he loved so much I talked outloud to him and even took a photo of him out of my pocket to let him know I still held him dear to me. So, Sue I would say take each day slowly, don’t rush, grieve but take care of yourself and life has a habit of showing you the way and if you look really hard that light, no matter how dim does begin to shine through.
xxxx
yes of course, by all means Mary, and what a lovely visitation from your husband,
blessings
Jen☆
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Hi Jackie, If this lady SM had seen what was to happen to Richard I doubt she would have said anything. I don’t think this is what they do. Can you imagine if she had said anything and then it hadn’t happened. Be grateful Jackie that you was blissfully unaware of your terrible loss as I knew for ten years that I could lose Brian and for the last few months knew without a doubt the outcome and it is the most terrible thing imaginable and in your thoughts continually, eating away at you.
Take care and thinking of you
Love Pat xx
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Dear Sheila,
I could have cried as I read your post, it is from the heart, I can identify with you, I am going to buy another TV for our bedroom. I never thought of having the other conveniences. We already have one( a tv) but although it is an excellent picture, the quality of the sound is very poor since Stan passed away my deafness has become worse. I have 2 hearing aids, which I bought myself, I was fitted with a couple at the hospital, however, one broke. I rang the audiology clinic and I was told that I was not due for another appointment for another 2 years. I finished up going to a private firm. grrrrrr. I had never thought to have a machine in the bedroom either or biscuits. I shall remedy that by next week.
Thanks again, I shall be in touch.
Love
Mary
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Dear Sheila,
I found comfort in your post. I am in the depths of despair having lost my husband nearly 6 months ago. I hate my life alone and wish I could go to sleep and not wake up. Your post gives me hope that one day it will be easier.
Love Barbara
Hi my wife passed 7 months ago I have been to a medium if you can find a good one it can be a very helpfull experience it won’t bring them back but you do feel closer to them
Thank you, dear Sheila, for your reply,
I do have some headphones, I never thought about using them, I can be quite gormless at times:smile: I have started having drinking chocolate before I go to bed, I became really fond of it whilst I was in the hospital.
Your bedroom sounds delightful, our’s is very plain, yet at the moment I do not wish for any changes, my Stan died in it. I do understand when you mention being young and in love, I am sure the longer you are together the harder it is to part.
It is now time for my apple juice, mixed with fizzy flavoured water.
Goodnight my friend,
I hope that you sleep better tonight,
Love
Mary
Thank you Sheila. Thinking you are getting nearer to being with your husband again is a very good way of looking at, what for me, is an almost unbearable pain. In fact hearing from you and that you have survived is so helpful. I am so very lonely and unhappy that I cannot really believe I will come through, but you have, so I can hope that I will too in time.
Love Barbara x
Dear Sheila,
You are stronger than you think you are, this is all so sad, yet you have survived 5 years without your beloved Peter. I do admire you, I am so glad that I have reached the age of 80, I won’t have so long to wait until I am reunited with him, I love him so much.
I hope that you have a peaceful night with refreshing sleep,
Take care and please do not go to sleep with the cup of hot chocolate in your hand.
Blessings and love
Mary x
Mary - Pat…
…no i would not have wanted Sally Morgan to have told me of Richards death, no not at all, it was just my figure of speech mentioning how uncanny it was that my Richard should die in such a short time after us going to see our very first live show Psychic performance…
Oh yes, i got on my Richards nerves when he was here with me, i am not about to stop now he has gone, think if i remember i had even told him this in the past, that i will probably not change…yes again this was my sense of humour, where Richard was never sure whether i was joking with him or not, but i feel he felt that i meant it…I will keep on talking to him the same as i talked non stop to him when he was here with me, i am not about to change…
Good morning Jackie. It is my understanding that psychic mediums will never give out bad readings such as imminent deaths. About 5 months after my husband’s passing I visited a medium. I have to say I was terrified. However, it was a truly amazing experience. The lady started off by saying that she wouldn’t tell me anything which she thought was inappropriate or likely to affect my life in a bad way. The stuff she did tell me though was spot on and no way could she have known those things. I had given her no information about me at all, not even my name. Not only did she talk about my husband, she mentioned my late brother too, even describing his earthly physical appearance. Yes, I was in floods of tears afterwards but it was a most wonderful, comforting experience. The other uncanny thing was that in her shop there was a pottery mini car ornament, with union jack on the roof and behind the driver’s wheel was a man which looked exactly like a caricature of my husband. I did of course buy it.
Anyway, just thought I would share this with you. I haven’t told many people about my visit, being afraid of negative reaction. Some can be quick to sneer and I don’t think I could stand that. Whether one believes or not, if it’s given someone comfort then it’s a good job done. I haven’t been back to the lady either as I think she fulfilled my need, for the time being at least. Xx
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Thank you Kate, it is kind of you to share.
Love,
Mary x