loneliness

Hi everybody, I am 72yo.My wife passed away November 22nd 2015,since then I have been living (or existing) with loneliness. I go out each day wandering garden centres- libraries- museums etc -anywhere just to get out. I have no friends and my two brothers died within the last 18 months,all in all I have lost most of my family circle,so I have nobody to ring or visit. I have a step-daughter who suffers with depression and is going through the menopause, and like me has bereavement issues.On the occasions that I visit her -she usually “has a go at me” over anything ie I was not good enough for her mother- I am very impatient etc or I but in when she is speaking.So I have stopped calling there-- maybe in a few weeks I will try again? Unfortunately this means I stop seeing my grand-daughters -twin girls 23yo, that is the hard part.I just wish that I could find just a scrap of happiness somewhere! I often wish that I was in the cemetery with my wife.Sorry for the negative thoughts folks
I have nobody to confide in best wishes Alanx

Hi Columbine im sorry for your loss im 57 a widower march last year .Im all alone too i plan day by day cant plan any further forward .Speak your mind on here i do nobody will jjudge you or tell you off .Theyll try to help .I and a lot of people on her donmt mind private messages so if 1 to 1 is your thing no problem on here .Dont be a stranger Colin

Hi Columbine,so sorry to hear about your loss I lost my husband in oct 2016 he was 51.Are there not any groups you could join in your area,you could ask at your library they might know,or if you have any hobbies that you used to have or perhaps even voluntary work.it is hard enough when someone passes,you just want kindness and love.I would leave your stepdaughter alone for a while and think about what you want,easier said than done I know,you could write your grandaughters a letter explaining why you wont be around for a while but they are welcome to come and visit you as you would like to see them.some areas have a number of different groups, in my area for instance they have one where you can do Art ,IT,go on trips etc I am unfortunately to young for this its for the over 60’s.I wish you luck in finding something the salvation army might be one to try too

Dear Columbine,
I am so sorry to hear how lonely you are. Have you thought about contacting ‘The Silver Line?’ You can phone any day 24 hours a day to speak to someone and can ask to have a volunteer friend to chat to once a week. Take care, Best wishes, Julie

Hi Columbine

My circumstances are very similar to your own. I am 70. My dear wife passed in december 2014. I see my sister twice a week for an hour or so, I see my daughter in law and her two girls (14 and 16) occasionally, as she works very long hours.
As you have found this leaves me with huge amounts of time alone,there are many days when I speak to no one.I spend my time walking by the river, around the garden centre and supermarkets. A huge amount of TV .I visit her my Paulines grave 3 times a week always ending in tears.
I do find this site a comfort as it makes me realise I am not alone in my grief and loneliness. I sincerely hope it will do the same for you.
best wishes
George

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