Loosing met husband

Lost my husband of 35 years at the young age of 58.
Short and difficult battle with appendaceal cancer
Feeling traumatised and needing someone in similar situation to talk to


@Lily12 I am so sorry that you lost your husband. You must be in so much shock. This forum will give you plenty of support. Life indeed is unfair and so cruel. I lost my husband suddenly at Christmas. He was 53 years old and I am 56 years old. I went to work on the Saturday and Sunday I got a call from my son to say that dad had collapsed. Time I got home he was gone. The post mortem report said that he died of a massive rear saddle pulmonary embolism and kidney cancer which was in both kidneys and had burst through the lining of the kidney and sitting at the bottom of the blood vessels. He never knew he had cancer. We had just celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. Take one hour at a time baby steps and don’t look to far into the future. I do hope that you have plenty of support. Take care and big hugs xx



So very sorry for your loss. My husband was 58 & died suddenly , no warnings at all . We were married 33 years 2 days after he passed .

Sending you big hugs xxxx


So sorry lily12
I lost my husband on August 24 2022, one day before our 15th wedding anniversary. I only found this site at the beginning of May ( the first in May bank holidays)
All your feelings and thoughts are normal, and you will find people on here get you and understand, so message when you want, or just scroll the posts on the different feeds,and you hopefully they will bring some small comfort just to know you are not completely alone in your thoughts.
Hugs :hugs::hugs::hugs:


@Lily12 so sorry for your loss. My situation is different but I also lost my husband to cancer. He battled prostate cancer for nearly 4 years and passed away 8 weeks ago tomorrow. We were also married for nearly 35 years. I am 55. I have found this forum a comfort just being able to chat with people that understand what we are going through. Hopefully you will too. Sending hugs


Thank you everyone and so sad to hear all your loss too
I cared for my husband for 9months
He spent two months in hospital having the mother of all surgery. I stayed in hospital accommodation with him has it was at the other side of the country
He was fit well with nothing wrong with him prior to his belly swelling with ascites
His cancer was aggressive he lost stones of weight and they couldn’t remove all the cancer
We returned home in October. With an ileostomy and needed lots of care. In November the oncologist tried chemo to try and give him 18 months to 3years unfortunately this made his symptoms worse after two cycles they stopped. Referred us to Marie Currie.
His systems got worse quickly loosing so much weight not eating sleeping developed a malignant pleural effusion which he was given a permanent drain and I was taught how to drain litres of fluid from his lungs every week so he could breath. He them developed bowel obstruction has the cancer spread I nursed him for months. The Marie Currie team used cocktails of drugs to try to help symptoms but he managed to give our daughter away but the day after became bed bound. Just one week later died at home in our bed in the most distressing way.
This was three weeks ago. I now have to come to terms with his loss and my four grown children’s loss too. I feel numb not sure how to start my life up again and dealing with all the financial crap and the excruciating pain of losing my sole mate friend and lover is so overwhelming. Don’t know how to move on.


@Lily12 you have had such a traumatic time caring for your husband and then him losing the battle. I can relate to so much of what you describe. Cancer really is the most wicked disease. My husband was fit & healthy 4 years ago with no health conditions then like your husband ended up with dozens :broken_heart:. Sending lots of hugs.

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