Hi I lost my mum 11 days ago. She was an alcoholic & narcissist. Our relationship was strained over the last few years but I stay next door. My dad passed 21months ago due to alcoholism & I have just been thro the trauma of watching her pass away at hospital. I have no siblings or family support and am crippled with pain and depression wishing i helped her. She’s still not had funeral or anything as been for a PM but cause of death is still pending investigation. I feeel relieved she will never hurt me again but Also the kid person she was before the alcoholism made her so toxic. I can’t sleep ave flashbacks from them doing cpr it’s so hard to cope
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Hello Isobel14, I’m so sorry you’re going through this. What you’ve experienced sounds incredibly traumatic, and it’s completely understandable that you’re struggling with so much pain, confusion and difficult emotions. Please don’t blame yourself — you were faced with an incredibly difficult situation and you did what you could. I hope you can find some support around you because you really shouldn’t have to carry all of this alone. Be very gentle with yourself. Sending you love and hugs 
