Losing my Brother

This is the first time i am talking to anyone about how i feel about the death of my brother.
I lost my brother suddenly during the pandemic, he had a heart attack, it was the most painful thing i have gone through, we had no idea where his body had been taken too, i had to ring round to find the hospital, it was just heart breaking.
The thought that i would never speak to him again or see him again just broke my heart, i had always felt protective of him as he suffered depression, i had to be strong for my mum and myself to get us through the funeral.
I had no one i could talk too as everyone seemed to go quiet, I don’t feel like i am getting any better with my grief, i have melt downs which build up on me and then i cry for days.

I am so sorry about your brother , it must be heart breaking when you lose someone suddenly like that . I think people don’t always understand how close siblings can be but if you think about it its the longest relationship you have in your life .
I am in a similiar situation , my brother is terminally ill with and its moving at a much faster pace than i anticipated i hate the thought of losing him , and i’m trying to put a brave face on for other family members . its not easy to find someone you tell your real feelings to .

4 Likes

I’m so sorry to hear about your brother, It is true the sibling relationship is a special one, you have been through everything together the good times and the bad, supported each other, cried with each other, laughed with each other, i fell so empty now.

Yes i am worried about how i will feel ,
I have other siblings but we can talk to each other in confidence
, i don’t have that with the others .
Do you have other siblings or good friends you can talk to . ?

2 Likes

No, i don’t have other siblings or anyone i can talk too, i talk to my mum who is 80, she said she had lost her best friend when my brother died, to hear my mum crying and knowing there is nothing i can do to heal her pain except give her a cuddle and be there for her.
I was out the other day and felt emotional and when i got home i broke my heart and said to my mum i want my brother, it was horrible.

2 Likes

I have been getting alot of help from Mind they are really , they have a thing called tea and talk. It a group that meet in cafes , its really informal and everyone is so nice and supportive. . I’ve registered with mind in Bradford but you dont have to be registered to go to the tea and talk you just turn up , i don’t know if its for you but if you look on there website it will give you a list of whats on ,in your local area .
It sounds like you could do with a support network people you can openup to . :blush:

1 Like

Thank you for that, that’s kind of you to let me know about that, i’m glad you are meeting people and talking.