Losing my dad at 23

I feel strange reaching out on here as I am usually an introvert, but here I am seeking acceptance as I feel nobody really understands what it’s like to loose a parent unless they have been through it to which none of my friends have .
I lost my dad in Sep 2022 , a week after my 23rd birthday , he fell ill and had to go to hospital to which after putting up the biggest fight of his life and previous medical conditions sadly passed away.
My dad was my life, he raised us while my mum worked as he had just retired , you know the school runs, weekend takeaways , the “ I’ll let you play out longer but don’t tell your mum “ trust relationship? He was my rock .
But nobody prepares you for loosing them when you’re young, I feel robbed, he had lived such an amazing life he was 81! I’d be thrilled if I even lived half the life he did , but I am heartbroken beyond belief that he won’t see my children, my wedding, none of it . I personally think he still had a few years left in him to which I believed I’d atleast give him a grandchild .
Is there anyone on here who has unfortunately been in a similar situation? It’s only been a few months and still feels like it happened last week but because I have no children I feel it’s so so hard to get back to normal life?

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Hello @Emma0169 I’m sorry you’re going through this pain at such a young age. Your dad sounds like an incredible man to have done so much for you at an age when most dads are taking things easy! I’ve recently lost my dad although I’m much older than you and I can only imagine the pain of having to face this at 23. I don’t think you’ll ever feel the same as you did when your dad was here, but I’ve been told it generally takes about a year before you can think of him and smile rather than cry - it’s a different journey for everyone though. I feel sure someone on here will have been in the same situation and will be able to offer advice and support, but I just wanted to say hello and assure you there’s always someone here to chat to. Look after yourself and keep posting when you need to. Jack x


Hi Jack

Thank you for your kind reply, you are right it certainly doesn’t feel the same! The pain is real at any age I believe , there’s 8 of us in our clan so my dad has seen a lot of my older brother and sisters lives but I am one of younger ones on the chain of command so I missed it!
It’s cruel how life can bring us such grief of loosing a parent , it just doesn’t feel right no matter what anyone says
Sorry to hear about your dad , they are our heroes in life I believe
Here if you ever need to talk x

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Thanks Emma. I’m even more impressed that your dad has spent so many decades raising his clan! You’ll have lots of support from your siblings in the years ahead, which will be a huge help.
Yes, it’s not fair that we have to experience this horrendous grief even though it’s supposedly the “natural order” of life. I’ve never felt pain like this before and I’m fearful of a future without his unconditional love, endless support, laughter and good advice. But I know he went through it with his parents, and came to terms with it. We all have to, somehow.
Take care and be kind to yourself
Jack x