I feel absolutely bereft losing my dad.
I know that he had a great life, up until the end. However, that is no comfort for me at this time.
All i want is my dad here, and, as selfish as that might sound, i can’t help it.
Because, my heart is broken.
Nobody will ever love me the way that my dad loved me. And it hurts so bad.
Its only been 4 weeks, but the longer the time goes on, the worse i feel and my emotions are all over the place.
Ive had thoughts and a plan on joining him, i dont want to live without him. But i need to be here for my mum.
Has anybody got any coping strategies or anything that they might think could be of help to me during this time
1 Like
Hi @Spiffycarp,
I’m sorry to hear your dad. Your loss is so recent and raw, so please do try and be gentle with yourself. It’s not selfish at all to want your dad back.
You’ve asked for some coping strategies, so I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources that might help:
- Our Losing a parent support page talks through some of what you might be feeling and how to cope
- Am I normal? talks through some of the common thoughts and feeling in grief
- Our Grief Guide self-help platform has lots of resources to help support you, as well as tools like journaling and a digital memory box
I’m worried to read that you’ve had thoughts and a plan on joining your dad. We know that a lot of people experience suicidal thoughts when they are grieving. We have a video about it here which you might find helpful:
https://griefguide.sueryder.org/support/suicide
I want to reassure you that you’re never alone - there’s always someone out there to support you.
If you feel like you’re in crisis and need some extra support outside of the community, I would encourage you to reach out to one of these organisations below who can help you stay safe.
-
If these thoughts of suicide become overwhelming, please call 999 or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.
-
You can call 111 and choose the mental health option to speak to a trained mental health professional (England, Scotland and Wales only)
-
Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.
-
Shout are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text SHOUT to 85258 and talk to them about anything.
-
You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline.
Please know that the community is always here for you, too.
Take lots of care - keep reaching out,
Seaneen
I am so sorry to hear you’re feeling this way. I lost my Dad in August and it is still raw.
I keep being told it will get easier and some days it feels it, then it comes crashing back.
I am trying to stay strong for my Mum too it’s awful.
I really hope you can start feeling better x
I know exactly how you are feeling. I lost my dad in October this year and I am struggling really badly at the moment. Feel like I have to be strong for my mum but when I’m at home all I do is cry. It still doesn’t seem real until I look at his photo and realise I will never see him or speak to him again and it’s destroying me.
I am so sorry for your loss. It is dreadful feeling like this. I am the same. I’ve gone back to work but am struggling x