Losing my mum

From last year things have gone from bad to worse.
My uncle died last year leaving my 89 year old nan 5 hrs away, so we have to deal with this.
A month later my other uncle passed away and then the following month both my mum and dad became unwell and both went into hospital.
Sadly my mum was put on end of life care (68 years old) and April this year she passed away.
My whole world has been ripped apart, I miss her so much.
It feels like she has just gone away and i’ll see her soon (obviously I know she is not with us anymore) but it just doesn’t seem real.
I thought I was coping, I go to work and meet up with people and normal things but inside I’m dead.
I’m a strong person and never cry in front of people if I can help it but I had a meltdown in a petrol station the other day, must of looked like a fruit loop.
I’m staying strong for my kids but the future looks bleak and it’s hard.
I’ve thought about not being here (I’m not suicidal) too scared, but just some days I don’tvwant to be here, I want to be with my mum.
My whole life she has been here and now I have to carry on without her.
I’m now looking after my dad and my nan and some days it’s just too much.
I have no time to myself or my own little family.


Hello @Precious1,

I’m so sorry to hear about your mum. It sounds as though you’re feeling overwhelmed right now.

I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you are feeling here and I hope that you find the community a good source of support. Everyone here has experienced the loss of a loved one and will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that may help you right now.

Another good place to take a look at is the NHS website, which explains more about what kind of support is available to you as a carer.

Take care - keep reaching out,


Hi Precious, I’m so sorry to hear about your mum, everything you have said, I feel the same, I lost my mum in April, very quick, she got told she had 3 months to live, she lasted 4 weeks, I feel totally devastated, nothing seems to matter to me anymore, I’ve had a few meltdowns too, it just doesn’t seem real at times, I’m so lost without my best friend x


Sounds like you’ve really been thorough it. I’ve had back to back family deaths (dad and uncle) and now my husband is terminally ill and my mum has heart failure. I have 2 kids 12 and 14 which I feel so sad they are going through all this and they won’t have their dad soon… I bet you feel constantly torn trying to juggle everything like I do?
Please don’t feel you have to “be strong” all the time, it’s good to cry and it’s good for your kids to see normal emotional behaviour. I’ve cried a fair bit and we end up laughing together saying “ mummy’s crying again and it’s good to let it all out if you’re sad” infact, I think I’ve cried on many random strangers too. Do it, let it out and have a damn good cry (and maybe get some counselling too as that can help) xx


Sorry to hear you lost you Mum and orhers too, Precious, thats really a lot of grieving and still youre having to be strong for your own family. Youre not alone, i promise, i think there must be a lighter brighter time in the future for you all. I miss my Mum died suddenly in May, my Dad was very reliant on her and i feel Ive lost myself and my own life now to look after him. I love him but resent this too. Very depressed most days. I wish things were better. Wish i wasnt here anymore and could be with my mum, my closest friend. I miss her voice very much.