Im just not coping. Mum fell seriously ill all of a sudden and spent 3wks in ICU before she passed away on the 6th November, she was only 72, fit and well (so we thought anyway), i just cant believe she has gone, the feeling is just to overwhelming, i just want it to stop.
I’m so sorry for your loss. your feelings of being overwhelmed are so normal right now.it’s too early for anything else in my recent experience.my heart goes out to you.
Have you got any support around you?
Hi, this is exactly how I feel too, I lost my Dad on the 19th October, his funeral was last Tuesday. He was poorly with Cancer, but went down hill very quickly in the end. I am beyond devastated, I also feel I cant cope. It is overwhelming. I feel so panicky all the time. I wish I had advice for you, but I too am lost like you. You are not alone. Hugs.
I do have support, but thay are grieving to. My husband has been wonderful, but they cant make this awful feeling go away, it just unbeatable
I had my siblings for support, and I know what you mean, when you’re all grieving (and differently) it’s not always easy to feel like you can lean on your family (I didn’t want to add my grief onto my sisters) nobody can take away your awful feelings unfortunately, they are unbeatable it feels like we just have to go with what’s thrown at us minute to minute.
I felt the panic aswell, even caught myself walking carefully and slowly so I didn’t fall….it rocks our entire foundation, sometimes there isn’t advice,we’re all here to support wherever we can I suppose x
Hi @Sun @Ellen51 @Amaya82 I feel the same. Devestated at losing my mum, she also left before her time, although she was in hospital for a few weeks we did not expect her to die. The whole thing was so traumatic. I’ve felt so panicky ever since, I think because I’ve lost my main support, my mum was my whole family, I don’t have anyone now apart from my husband. So I’ve felt panicked how I’m going to go the rest of my life without her. I’ve found most people don’t understand, apart from on here x
Can relate to all of that, the panic, the fear, the anxiety, never seeing her again just doesn’t feel right. I have this constant feeling that theres something i should do but i dont know what it is .
I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m in the exact same place, having lost my dad just recently. I’m panicking the whole time and can’t seem to find any meaning anywhere.
I feel this so much. The panic for me is the worst, I am really struggling to cope each day. Nothing is the same.
I know. Dad and I actually lived together these last few years too, supporting each other, so the emptiness is devastating.
It does feel like it gets worse every day.
One thing that is helping me is that my mum had 2 dogs, i now have one and my sister has the other, we meet every day for a walk and talk about how we feel and how hard it is. We also find ourselves telling people we meet all about it , its amazing how kind people are and they end up sharing there similar experiences, it really does help and lifts the dark cloud, ever if it just for a little while.
Im so very sorry, I didnt live with my Dad, but we were exceptionally close. I had my two children young and he has been their main father figure. We went on holidays together and spoke every day. I do still have my mum but she too is unwell. Im terrified of her dying too. Im literally just coping with the unberable pain and panic. Xx
That sounds nice, glad to hear you have her dog and your sister so close. It’s what we have to do now, try to find the little glimpses beyond the dark cloud, but it’s so hard.
I feel this way too. Like my anchor has gone. It’s so hard feeling this way and feeling does anyone understand. I’m trying to keep going, but it seems like everything has a tinge of pointlessness or something. I am a Mum, a partner and a sister to two brothers. I’m spending time with my Mum’s sister and her sister in law who were very close wit her but feel frightened of losing them too. It’s all so strange to be in this place.
Hello, I too am a mum and a partner and I have a brother, but I so know what you mean about life feeling pointless. Its such a difficult feeling to describe to those who have never experienced it. I am desperately sad, I think I’m almost afraid of my sadness because it seems uncopable with if you know what I mean? I feel like I’ve lost part of my very essence. The sheer panic is the worst, I expected to feel sad, but this is so much more than sadness…it is utter despair. I dont know what to do. I am glad other people do understand though, I feel less alone. X
I struggle with that as well, the worry that I can’t cope without my mum. I have my husband to support me, but as he is the only close family I have left, I worry if anything happened to him too, and then I’d be completely alone. It’s that crushing panic mixed with the sadness. It’s so exhausting. And I just carry on day to day and try and live my life and go to work and it’s so difficult and I’m so tired I just want my mum back. It would fix everything. I know she would hate how scared and lonely I am without her and she would be here if she could. Im only 32 so potentially have so much of my life I have to slog through without her - that’s how it feels now, like it will be a joyless, lonely slog of a life x
I feel this exactly, like life is going to be lonely and joyless forever, Im slightly older than you, I’m 41, but I relate so much to what you say.
Thank you. Oh, I’m sorry your mum is unwell, I understand your worry and it must be so difficult in the midst of everything else.
It’s good to have people here who I can relate to and them with me. I knew I’d never be prepared for this moment in time. I lost my Dad when I was 17 suddenly to heart attack. He was only 48. It affected me immensely and for many years. It feels different losing my Mum but not better different. Words are definitely hard to come by to describe. I’m going through the motions of life continuing, but its like being in a new dimension which is somehow looking the same but certainly not feeling anywhere like normal. I wonder if anyone here would be further along their grief who would recognise this but have some reassurance we will find our way again.