Hi I’m new here I lost my partner on 2nd December from brain cancer. We had a wonderful holiday in August but when we got back he started to feel really tired. He went back to work for couple of days then kept bumping into things. We went to doctors and he did some tests and immediately sent us for an MRI which came back brain cancer. He went in hospital for a biopsy and lumbar puncture. He started to drag his foot on right hand side. We made the living room into our bedroom, at least we were sleeping in the same bed he could no longer climb the stairs. I looked after him everyday he was given 12/18 months to live. We were devastated his step children and grandchildren were heartbroken. He was on steroids. Then just as we thought it couldn’t get any worse he had a seizure one morning which was the most awful thing I’ve ever been through. I had to give him CPR and managed to get him back. Then lots of medics worked on him and took us blue lights to Kings. The doctor told me the next 24 hours would be critical. Me and my grown up children never left the hospital that night. He then opened his eyes early morning and said any chance of a cuppa !!! He was a fighter. I slept at the hospital in a chair and never left his side. He was put on a high dose of steroids but where he had the seizure he was unable to move only managed to get movement in his right hand. We didn’t give up. He came home and had to have a hospital bed with special mattress. I slept on sofa next to his bed. This man was my whole life my soul mate. I could not believe this was happening to our family. We then had to go to Guys cancer centre where before the doctor had told us he couldn’t have surgery to remove the tumours because it was liquid. We were told he now had 2/3 months to live. My whole world fell apart. We had carers in 4 times a day and we spoke about us being together and him dying at home with his step children no more hospitals. I am truly thankful for everyday I got to spend with him we told each other everything we needed to. I loved this man with all my heart he could still swallow and eat normally at this time. Then came the morning where he couldn’t swallow his meds had to call nurses in who put him on a syringe driver for his meds. I knew it wouldn’t be long he shut his eyes and didn’t wake the next day. His breathing got really bad towards evening to nurses came out made him comfortable and then at ten past ten he took his last breath with me and his children around his bed. I have gone through every emotion. I’m still not at work I have to go back beginning of Feb. I have to pay the bills. Some days I don’t even want to wake up and get myself up. I have his ashes home now what he wanted but I’m a total mess. I know people say time is a healer but I just try and take every day that’s all I can do at moment. I try and do a job to keep myself occupied but some days I just sit and cry. I’m here if anyone needs to talk or have a shoulder to cry on xx
Hi lovely, I’ve just read your post and my heart is breaking for you.
In November 3 rd 22, 4 days before his 54th birthday, my lovely husband said to me at breakfast my face was distorted. I thought he had a migraine starting and told him to go back to bed. Later on that day he was sick and had, 2 small seizures we had no idea they were seizures, and 111 were only concerned he’d had a stroke but being as he could talk and lift his hand they weren’t too bothered and just said to keep my eye on him! The next day he had a terrible headache and we were lucky to get straight into our wonderful GP who sent him to A&E, after an initial CT scan and various test we found out on 2nd December 22 it was a stage 4 Glioblastoma and was terminal. We were told that without treatment he would have 6 months with 12/18 months. He had chemotherapy radiotherapy and steroid treatment. On the 20th of April 23, he took a turn for the worse and we got him our spare bed down into our lounge, later a hospital bed and palliative care in place.
He managed to get out for another CT scan on the 5th of May on which they found a cyst as well on top of the tumour. I never told him the result of that one, he didn’t ask, he knew he wasn’t going to get better. I lost him on the morning of the 26th of May 23, he took his last breath in my arms,he lasted 6 months. I’ve been through the “first” of everything without him now, birthdays Christmas anniversaries, all of those things. It’s still truly surreal and I find myself shouting/ screaming, breaking down on a regular basis. It’s so unfair and unjustifiable that such wonderful people are taken so quickly. My life, as lm sure you’ll understand, will never be the same again. Much love to you. Andrea.
Thank you for replying it helps to talk to someone that understands what you’re going through. My partner was 55 been through so many different feelings, Glad he is out of pain but can’t believe I will ever get over this pain I feel. I have to return to work on 5th of Feb but I don’t know how I’m gonna do it. All my work colleagues have been lovely sending me messages and flowers but I really don’t want to see anyone or go through my partners death a 100 times. Had terrible day yesterday didn’t want to get out of bed and cried most of the day, but today I got up early daughter made me cuppa and I started painting my hallway 