Loss of a mother

I lost my mom 5 years ago now very unexpectedly. My mom took her own life. At the time I had to concentrate on being strong for my grandparents, funeral arrangements and completing my degree. I had also just come out of a relationship and feel I never really gave myself the time to grieve for my mom. I managed it at the time surprisingly well and even those closest to me would comment on how strong I had managed to be and how well I did to keep it together.

For the last few months I have found things very difficult. I find myself constantly thinking about it and asking myself the unexplained questions. Over the last few weeks I have been crying every day. I went to the GP yesterday to get some advice and she believed that I was suffering with delayed grief. Is it possible this long after the loss? She recommended I looked for some type of bereavement counselling and take some time off work. However, I have only just started a new job over the last month which I have found difficult to concentrate on but I worry that it looks awful to be off so soon. I am just looking for any kind of advice please.


I’m sorry that you’re having a really difficult time at the moment. It’s not a suprise that you’re finding it difficult to concentrate on your new job, changing jobs can be stressful in itself.

From what I know about grief & from what I’ve read from the posts on the forum it seems that people grieve in many different ways & you can grieve at different times.

When my Mum died 4 years ago I did have bereavement counselling & found it incredibly useful. It was my safe place every week where I could say anything I wanted. In a couple of sessions I think I cried practically the whole time. It does sound like something you might find a real support right now. Many counsellors will do late afternoon sessions if that might be easier for you at work.

There are alternative therapies like ‘Mindfulness’ which is a form of meditation which can help with concentration. The important thing it to find an outlet for your thoughts, feelings & emotions. There are lots of lovely supportive people on the forum who will undertsnad what you’re going through.

Keep posting & take care. Trudy x