Loss of a twin

Hello,
I have just joined and wondered if anyone here has lost a twin?

Hello ElizabethD,

Welcome to this community. I’m not too sure whether there is anyone here who has lost a twin, but there are members who have lost brothers or sisters. Here are a couple of recent conversations that you may wish to have a look at:

So lost: https://support.sueryder.org/community/coping-bereavement/so-lost

Only sibling died at 38: https://support.sueryder.org/community/coping-bereavement/only-sibling-died-38

If there’s anything I can do to support you, please do let me know.

Take care,
Eleanor

I will be losing my twin to gallbladder and liver cancer either today or tomorrow. It was diagnosed in April and although we have been estranged these past few years to circumstances out my hand, I always loved him.
I knew the minute I saw him at a family gathering that he had cancer. I felt it. At the time I was going through my own health issues and although the diagnosed I had for myself weren’t great I thought I was going to die soon. I was convinced! In fact, although I’m not well at all and my life expectancy won’t be as long due to my condition, it seems that all the way along he was the one dying. I have been getting his symptoms without knowing. From April until now the cancer has been aggressive and he now lays in a hospital bed, non responsive. I said my goodbyes to him yesterday but the thought he won’t be around has destroyed me. I’m not eating, sleeping and I’m dreading the phone call that is to come to tell me he has passed away.
I have never had a loss in our family, so to lose my twin is so consuming. All I’m thinking about as I don’t want him to die to be alone in a cold mortuary. I don’t want to bury him. I don’t want him to be in heaven alone.
I’m hurting like I’ve never hurt before. I can’t cope now and don’t know how I can even contemplate going to his funeral.
I don’t know what to do. I have anxiety and I don’t want to deal with him leaving me.

Hi Par7,

I’m so sorry to hear that you are about to lose your twin to cancer. It sounds as though you are extremely close and it is understandable that this is incredibly painful for you. I just wanted to let you know that this is an older conversation that you are replying to, so I’m not sure if the poster is still active on the site. We do have currently active users who have lost a sibling - for example, Sister2. You can find a conversation that she started here: https://support.sueryder.org/community/life-after-bereavement/beginning-end

To get more replies and support, you may also wish to consider starting a new conversation yourself: https://support.sueryder.org/thread/add

It is good that you were able to say your goodbyes - our hospice staff say that people can hear you even when they are not responsive. I’m glad that you have found this site and been able to share some of what you are feeling here. It’s really important to have outlets for your emotions, as bottling things up can make them even worse. Try to be kind to yourself and don’t think too far ahead - just take things day by day or even hour by hour.

Hello I lost my twin sister April 2018
I wish I had seen you post before , but wasn’t table to even start communicating with others until now .
As I haven’t found any other twins to discuss things to .
Trudi

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