I lost my dad 27 December 24 and I feel lost without him, my mum is still here (they had been divorced for many many years) and has been there for me, as has my husband who lost both his parent a while ago. I don’t know what to do, I’ve had conversations with my mum, husband and other family members about this but can’t seem to express how I feel. Every time I start to talk about it I freeze up, I want to cry but can’t, I feel empty inside and it’s really affecting my life and mental health, i’ve had recommendations for grief counselling from doctors but feel stupid and don’t know what I would say to them.
Thank you for reading
Claire
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Hello @CLaire-K,
I can see that you’re new to the community - thank you for bravely reaching out. I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your dad, and that you’re feeling lost without him. It sounds like it’s really affecting your mental health and your life. Please know that you are not alone, and I’m sure many people here will be able to relate to how you’re feeling.
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support to you. In the meantime, you might find these Sue Ryder resources helpful to read.
- Our Losing a parent page talks through some of the emotions you may be experiencing
- Our Grief Guide self-help platform which has information, resources and advice to help you through your grief
- Our Bereavement Information pages which can walk you through what you are going through
I hope you find the community to be a support to you. Take good care and keep reaching out 
Harriet
Hi Claire, I’m sorry to hear about your situation. My wife had a lot of problems coming to terms with her mother’s death and although we would talk about how she felt she finally found comfort from seeing a therapist. It sounds to me like you need help and I would try, you won’t lose anything. I would also say that the first one may not help but don’t give up as you have to feel comfortable with the therapist to get any benefit.
You also say you don’t know what you would tell them and you think you would feel stupid. Well just repeating what you have written hear in this post is a good start. If I were the therapist I wouldn’t consider what you have said to be stupid.
Leaving these feelings unresolved often have consequences in our lives and those of your family. Resolving these issues will allow you to carry your father’s love for you, into all of your relationships. Take the advice of someone who has lost his wife that loving our families is the only thing of value in this world and should always be cherished.
Wishing you all the best
Tom
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