Loss of my husband

Hy all, I’ve joined this group as I’m in need of support, I lost my treasured husband in August I nursed him at home to the end, I miss him so much my life has turned upside down, this Xmas I woke for the first time on my own in 40 yrs then I realised the reality of losing someone so special, I have also had a change in personality which I’m finding hard to deal with I’ve shut myself away at home, been nasty to his family and been drinking way to much alcohol, I’m stressed daily without him I just don’t seem to be getting over the pain of it, I feel I’m. Or living any longer I’m just existing without him

Dear Debbie, I’m so sorry to hear about the death of your husband, grief is an awful thing to go through and everybody deals with it differently, I lost my husband to cancer and like you, nursed him at home til the end, even though you know it’s going to happen, the reality is so hard, I got through it by taking a day at a time, and keeping very busy, also going for daily walks with my dogs, I think without them I wouldn’t have got out of bed, have you had any counselling or spoken to your GP ? Be kind to yourself and accept help if offered, you will get through this, sending love Jude xx

Thank you Jude, I’m still working full time as a nurse myself, I was so exhausted leading up to my husband passing I was in over drive then I suddenly found myself alone in the house and very lonely, I’m not good at talking about myself and don’t want to burden my family, I’m finding this so hard

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I was a nurse as well, now retired, it’s strange but I think all nurses are the same, they don’t want to ask for help, for some reason we think we should be able to cope with everything life throws at us ! You must reach out to your family, they probably don’t realise that you are struggling xx

Hi Debbie lost my husband to Covid December the 5th
I am heartbroken struggling so much
Pain is unbearable just take all the help that’s given to you
Xx

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Hy Debbie I’m so sorry I feel your pain, I miss my husband so much, he treated me like a queen, he was very protective and loving, he was a rock. It’s so cruel was a fit man all his life and never sick, it’s shocking xx

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My husband was the same no health problems
Kept himself fit,
And the fought 12 days in hospital and he them had organ failure
My life over he was my everything xx

Hello Debbie
I lost my husband in November last year. He suffered with Bronchiectasis and had to go in hospital due to an exacerbation but caught covid there and passed away. I wasn’t with him when he passed away and I so wish he hadn’t gone in hospital. We were together 32 years and I took early retirement to care for him. The depth of my grief has really shocked me, he was a lovely man who always made me feel cherished and loved and the thought of life without his love and support really frightens me. I don’t like living alone and feel very lonely. I just keep thinking I must take one day at a time and there are many generations of widows and widowers who had to get through these terrible times. I will always love and miss him but hopefully the pain won’t always feel this raw.

Christy

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I’m so sorry Chrissy it sounds like you are in the same boat as me to, i smile when I think of the silly things he did, I have kept his belongings just as he left them I have moved nothing at all. It’s not fair to take someone so young, I’m afraid of the future without his love and support

I know Debbie, I can’t bring myself to move or dispose of any of his things. I still weep everyday but not the uncontrollable sobbing every day so that is a small improvement, although sometimes that still happens. I find it difficult to get out of bed every day and have no motivation to do anything. Covid makes the grieving process so much worse, as for me there is no distraction from my grief. It has helped me reading the comments on this site because at times I have felt I was going mad.
Chtisty

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