My wife Died on the 10th August this year she was and still is my first Love we where Married for 50years and we fell in Love after 2 weeks she was my PRIDE and JOY she went into Hospital at the back end of July i had Bag packed ready to bring her home But it wasn’t to be i am now left TO handle Living on my own.I go to a Bereavement Group and Today i broke down in Tears they are a very good support group these Long winter months and Long lonely Nights are what i have left i miss her Enormously but i know she would be Telling me too get on with Life i am finding it Very Hard to do but i know in my Heart that we will be together at some stage and i know we will be Together once again she was my First Love and she will be my Last she was Kind Thoughtful Forgiving and we where always Linked Hand in Hand,Arm in Arm and we where never apart. I miss her but i feel her presence in everything i do.I feel her in and around me in things i try to do she is my Insperation in every thing i do. I miss her and i just Ache with out her being here she is my insperation.The sadness and Grief is unbearable
Hi Ken, I’m so sorry about the loss of your wife , it’s heartbreaking and 50 years is a lifetime, you must miss her dreadfully, I’m so pleased that you go to a bereavement group, they do help, I find the winter the worst time, nothing feels as bad if the sun is shining and you can get outside into nature, I walk every day rain or shine with my dogs, they are what keep me going, sending love Jude xx
Thanks Jude 28,
It is a Lifeline for you with your dogs, i try and keep my self Busy as best i can,i try to take the Positives where i can.I have created a Memory Room where i feel i can talk to my wife i do know she would wish me to be strong and that is a bit difficult at the moment,i have my Birthday coming up later this month it will be the first one with out her being here and Christmas is fast approaching this year i will be pleased to see it over with my memory room will Help to a degree. On the day of her Funeral i picked out a song from Elvis Presley and it was (I will remember you ),and I always will she is The light of my Life i will keep Her close.
You will never forget her, I feel the same as you about Christmas, my husband died on the 21st December, every year I just want the day over, it is getting easier as the years go by, but there has never been a day goes by without me thinking about him and missing him, sending love Jude x
Hi Jude 28
The 21st December has to be a Heartbreaking time for you and so close to the Christmas my Heart goes out to you and i send my Love to you i don’t yet know how Christmas will be for myself this year or in the next few years i think i would proberbly put it all in one word (DIFFICULT) .This Christmas i won’t spend it with my Family as they Hurt also i am going to a community center on xmas day for 5 hrs but i will spend some time in my memory room and i will put some xmas decorations in there as my wife loved Christmas my Grief will stop me from putting Christmas into the Living Room but my Memory Room i hope will help.
As Memories are all i have left.
Sending Love KEN21
Morning,my friend ,this is so sad,we are all suffering this living hell of grief.How do we carry on without the one who made it all worthwhile. I am not looking forward to this winter without her ,the long dark cold nights and days are looking very scary at my age 76,alone in this house so empty . Michael x
Hello Michael,
My Wife was the Glue to our marriage we where chalk and CHEESE,BUT Chalk and cheese where married for 50 years i know that those years where magical and i hold them as close to me as i possibly can she was my one True Love and i know that in my Heart she will be my last,you are correct about this with the winter months and with Christmas coming in this year will be extremely Difficult my wife did look forward to Christmas but for me this year will be a non Starter i will get through it and i will be calling on her for Help and in my Heart i am 100% Sure she will be close as she always will be, there was nothing we didn’t Talk about and We did talk about Death and we both Discussed what what either one of us would do i remembered our conversations and because it was my Wife who Died first and the Grieving that comes with it is awfully painfull and people say to me take one Day at a Time i have had 2 Lousy days but today is another day,i have my memory room that i go to and spend some time with her i do know she will be there to put a Hand on my Shoulder and say YOU ARE DOING OK you know and when your time comes to join me i will be there for you because as you know Life is just a Blip.Michael you look after yourself and just try to do the best you can your Strength will come through your Wife hold onto her she is precious and she will know your pain as my wife knows mine
X
Hello Ken what a powerful message,thank you,we have lost our wives and are grieving for them,the pain is terrible,I am struggling everyday to come to terms with losing my darling wife Judith who made my world go round.I have had some really bad days this week,I have crumbled a couple of times and cried my eyes out,the loss is cutting deep into me.I hope she knows the pain and anguish that I am going through since she passed away and can give me some of her strength to help me get through the hard times to come this winter. My best to you Ken. Michael x
Hi Michael
We sometimes in our Lives never ever get the choices laid out in Front of us we as the Male of the Species are expected to be of a Strong nature when the Grieving Hits
Us, But i stand back and i Think to myself, and knowing that one of us would have had to go First would it BE FAIR TO my WIFE Elaine to have this Kind of Grief on Top of her illness she did not Die of Covid and it was not Cancer but it was something else,my mindset says to me YOU TAKE THIS PAINFULL GRIEF and let Elaine go Get Her wings in Heaven and let her Rest in his Arms i will Join her and i know she will be waiting for me at the end of my Day.I was with her when she Died and she went knowing that at some stage i would Join Her my Heart was broken and it still is i will Forever Be in Love with Her but i will be seeing her again and this Grief that i feel is mine to Bear but she Died Knowing she was my one True Love and always will be.
WE WILL MEET AGAIN and yes i will Thrive on her Strength as i always have but i for now have to Live without her but i do know she is around me
Take Care Michael .
Hi Ken sorry to hear about your wife I lost my husband last may we was married 39 years in November 5.this will be my second Xmas without him I will spend Xmas with my family and as I wk in a care home I will be at wk Xmas morning and boxing day I retire in 2023 I can’t wait now .
Hi LMUCHMORE.
I TOOK my Retirement and it gave me 7 years with my Beloved Elaine before she Died.in all of the time we where married she was never as ill until this last 12 months it has broken me but knowing i will meet with her again SOMEDAY that is where i am going to get my strength from and i do know she is around me and Her Strength i will hold dearly this xmas will be my First xmas without Her i have 2 Daughters and they Miss Her Terribly but they will also take the Knowledge that their Mum will always be in their Hearts it is a Hard time for the 3 of us they are Adults now and i know they will in their Grief be Thank full of the Legacy Elaine Left them with.As i was saying to Mickeyboy31 my Memory Room is where i can chat to her and i do believe i can feel her presence around me.Christmas will proberbly not have any meaning for me this year and the sooner i can put this year behind me the better. My Daughters will spend Christmas in their respective homes i can not spend Christmas with them as they will be Greaving themselves and it would be to much Heart Ache for me to be there we have a Local Group who will put be putting on Christmas Lunch and it lasts about 6 Hrs on Christmas Day it will be a room full of Strangers and that will be my Christmas Day weather permitting i will be going out for a Run out just to get out on Boxing Day and then hopefully Christmas will be behind me.What next year
Brings i do not know ?.i am pleased you will retire in 2023
I also hope all will go well for you when your Retirement arrives i send Love to you x
Such a moving message Ken,I admire your strength.Wish I could be that strong like you but I am weak and missing her so much ,my life is so empty now,hate being alone in this house now. Michael x
Michael,
My Strength is my wife Elaine and i will never give up she is with me every single day i can not see HER but i hold onto HER your not weak Michael speak to your Wife their is a lot of us out there And all of our Grief is so unbearable we look to have our LOVED ONES back and in our arms the houses we live in will always be Full of Love your wife would have created for you give it some Love.
Do not give up i WON’T it is not what my Beloved Elaine would have wanted she told me in a Verse that she has Hanging in our Kitchen and it goes REMEMBER YOU ARE.
BRAVER THAN YOU BELIEVE.
STRONGER THAN YOU FEEL
And SMARTER THAN YOU THINK.i hang onto those sentiments it is what Elaine would have wanted me to do so i will.
Love to you Michael x
Thank you Ken ,such a lovely heart felt message.The support we get from each other is so good. My best to you Michael x
Michael
Don’t You lose what we All are having to go through.One Day at a Time my Friend their is a lot of us out there and if you Get the Chance go and get yourself to a Bereavment Group i can Guarantee You will Benifit by it.
Thank You
KEN
Just had a major meltdown ,could not stop crying for her,it is getting harder for me to control this grief.The sight of food makes me feel sick and I am not sleeping that well.Going to seek help from a local group today. Thanks for caring Michael x
I am pleased you are going to get some Help i hope it works for you.
Take Care
KEN
Yes thank you ,I will be with a group of people who are suffering like me and maybe can help each other through this pain and grief.Michael x
The Group will Help You Michael .
Take Care .
KEN x
Yes I think it will ,to be with people who are also suffering this terrible thing we are going through and to talk and listen to them I am sure will help me .Being alone is my main worry at the moment,I am doing everything to be with friends and family at the moment,I have a couple of good neighbours who look out for me.My best to you Michael x