Lost my dad 10 months ago

I lost my dad to cancer and pneumonia in December I was with him when he passed. I felt pretty numb for a while then got back to work and have been ok ! But this week it was mine and my daughters birthday and I feel so low ! I know I have been dreading it for a while and the last few weeks have not been myself! My friends have said I have been different and not myself like I am preoccupied all the time! I am worried it won’t get better as I have Xmas coming up and the anniversary! Did anyone feel the same ? I am not sure whether to see the dr for help to get me through this next bit ! Any advice is appreciated xxxx

Hi Paula,

I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve lost your dad. Grief doesn’t follow a set pattern or timeline, and it can be quite common to be up and down with your emotions. It is also very normal for it to hit you harder around significant occasions like birthdays.

It’s important to have outlets for your emotions and have someone to talk to - whether that’s with friends and family or by writing things down on this site. Going to see your GP is also a good option - they will be able to point you in the direction of support services in your local area.

There was a conversation on this site recently where lots of people wrote about their experiences of coping with Christmas after losing a loved one - perhaps you’d find it helpful to have a read: https://support.sueryder.org/community/coping-death-loved-one/dreading-christmas

Here are some more links to conversations started by people who have lost their dad - you may like to read and reply to these:

If there’s anything I can help with, or you have any questions about the Online Community, just get in touch.

Community Manager