Lost my mother suddenly and unexpectedly

Hello, I lost my mum just over 6 months ago very unexpectedly. I had moved into my new home and I had just popped round to my mum and dads to drop some stuff off, my mum was gardening and seemed perfectly fine, i handed her a few things as she came in and out of the house but on the 3rd time she didn’t come back out, i didnt think anything of it and just walked in… thats when my world turned upside down.

She was sitting on the floor with her back up against the wall at the end of the hallway clutching her chest, i threw everything out my hands and ran towards her i knew she was having a heart attack, i screamed for my dad but he couldnt hear me because he was playing music in the garage, i ran and got him and told him to call an ambulance, my mum then slumped down the wall and went unconscious and stopped breathing, i did CPR on my mum (which i am still struggling to come to terms with) i managed to bring her back, when the amabulance arrived she was starting to turn again the next 20 minutes became a blur i was a mess on the floor in the garage, the paramedics told me she was ok she had a pulse and i did a good job… then everything came crashing down.

The paramedic came out about 10 minutes later and said she was not in a good way they couldnt maintain her heart beat, i watched them push my lifeless mum into the back of an ambulance, then she passed away in A/E. My mum fought to the very end. She was only 59.

I lost my mum at 28 years old and i have an 18 month old daughter… i thought the pain would ease and getting better, but with each day it just gets worse and worse, i keep going for my daughter and my dad as i know they both need me but i just wanted to know if anyone else has been through a similar situation? How did you manage? How did you cope? She was my bestfriend in the whole world, i would call her about 10 times a day and see her every single day, just feel like my heart as been ripped out of my chest.

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Hello EmmaLouise

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling, and what you are going through. I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your mum. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,


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