Lost the love of my life

My husband died in August after he got sepsis in hospital went in for an operation and never came home I just can’t get my head round it and I cry all the time. I’m on my own now we didn’t have any children. I feel like just going to bed and never getting up I’m total lost without him we did everything together . I can’t even bring myself to sort his clothes out it feels like losing him all over again if I throw his stuff out. I’m never felt pain like this and I’m in tears writing this. I see him where ever I look and I think I’m going crazy.

7 Likes

Sorry for your loss,my husband passed away at the end of September,grief is the most painful crushing feeling,absolutely heartbreaking,I have left everything of Steve’s just how he left it,there us nothing wrong with crying
I dread each day without him,a lot of people on here feel the same,it helps to speak on here

Take care of yourself x

4 Likes

Thanks it was his birthday the other day and with Xmas round the corner I’m struggling

4 Likes

Hi Midprint
So sorry for your loss,I loss my beloved husband 10mths ago and had no children.
It’s such early days for you and getting through hr by hr is enough ,and as for sorting out clothes don’t even try it’s to much for you to deal with can be done at another time .
For now you need to look after you,at early stages I couldn’t get out of bed and just wanted to die,with each passing mth I found I was getting abit stronger,it is hard and will never be the same person I was bfor my beloved soul mate died.
The pain at the early stages is so intense and you feel you are going out of your mind,I shouted, cried ,and whatever else I did to try cope.
I found reaching out to others going through the same pain helped me alot.
So please reach out and don’t suffer alone.
Sending you hugs and love :heart:

4 Likes

I understand it was Steve’s birthday last week first in over 50 yrs without him,I to cannot bear to think of christmas awful to have to keep seeing the adverts,didn’t realise until I came into this group so many heartbroken people,all we wanted was to be with our husband or wife now life is one big struggle

Look after yourself, talk on here whenever you need x

3 Likes

Hi Christine,I too have left everything as it was ,her clothes ,everything of Judith’s is where it was on the day she passed away.I cry for her everyday.We are all on the same page.Michael.

2 Likes

I am feeling so much heartache can’t stop crying,I miss my husband so much,still finding it hard to believe he’s not coming home,it’s been 7 weeks since he passed away,Don think I can stand anymore,this pain is to much,I try to keep going for our lovely family its getting harder as I realise he’s r really not coming back.

2 Likes

Struggling, just can’t sleep 2 30 all I can think about is my husband,going over everything that has happened,thought we had years left together,I miss him so much its painful,I feel so so sad and lonely

2 Likes

I am the same lost my wife 6th june this year with brain cancer 8 weeks after diagnosis cant throw anything away her car which she loved is outside no way can i sell it , i am waiting to wake from this nightmare i have been out with frends but when i get back home it feels so empty, i miss her sarcastic sence of humour she was 62 …she was a big elvis fan and one song which i keep on playing is just pretend …the words say it all xx

2 Likes

I lost my husband 4weeks after having a massive operation it all happened so quickly can’t get my head round we were married 51yrs left me devastated grief is so painful,wish I could sleep without all these heartbreaking thoughts going on in my head.

Sorry for your loss, I find it good to write my thoughts on this sight so many people understand the suffering

1 Like

Hi Christine this is me also,accepting is not easy,7 weeks for me also since Judith passed away,the heartache is overwhelming,the pain of grief eating me alive,do not know how to carry on or for what reason to carry on.Empty lonely life. Love Michael.

Hi Michael,I couldn’t sleep last night thinking of Steve the grief is getting worse having to come to terms with his loss its unbearable for us,don’t want to get out of bed whats the use can’t stop crying.You are right it is overwhelming.

Take care,x

1 Like

I feel lost again this morning,cannot stop thinking abiut Judith ,she is in my head all the time.My love for her was so complete,I hate this new life without her,it is nothing,meaningless,my pain is there evryday,I would give anything to have her back.She was my life ,my world,how can you carry on like this it is impossible.Love to you Michael.

I didn’t think losing Steve could get any worse but each day
is getting worse,don’t know what it is probably the realisation he really isn’t coming back,feel sick my heart is pounding
don’t know how we are supposed to cope with this

Christine x

1 Like

Yes I know Christine,it is horrendous what we have been left with,the pain and grief are too much to bear,I also get the pounding in the chest ,feels like your heart is trying to get out of your body.We are not coping with this that is the thing,here we are in this living nightmare of loneliness .I do not know what to say except I am so heartbroken and unhappy that I really do not want to go on for much longer.Much love Michael.

1 Like

To Michael, Christine, Misprint and everyone,
I’m so so sorry for the losses of your lovely partners. Before my wonderful man Sunny died in June this year, I’d experienced the loss of both my parents and thought I knew what grief felt like, but losing him has been completely different, with overwhelming pain and heartbreak that i have thought would destroy me. Our partners are like no other relationship aren’t they? The loss of my best friend, my advisor, my sweetheart, my cuddler, my practical helper, the love of my life, has turned my life completely upside down. We didn’t have children together either and I’m going to have to leave where I live to be nearer to family, get a new job, and completely start over. Its all very scary on top of dealing with my grief, and I’m just trying to take one step at a time.
I have just started having SR counselling and I must say that I’m finding it helpful to have my difficult thoughts and feelings understood and validated, and knowing that someone completely gets it is comforting. I would recommend it to anyone who is struggling. Please don’t struggle on alone. Our friends and family often don’t know what to say, they sometimes get it wrong and as we all know they can start drifting away. It’s 5 months now since Sunny died and each day is starting to get a little less horrendous. I hope that you all find peace and comfort.
Sophie x

1 Like

My husband died 7 weeks ago. I am not coping at all it’s getting harder. I cannot believe he as gone. Dave was a fir healthy man no illness then out the blue she felt poorly diagnosed with lukemia 12 weeks later he is gone. I am devastated unsure what I’m supposed to do now.
We did everything together he was my best friend. We ate all our meals together watched TV together. I now carnt even sit in the lounge. I have a gorgeous home but I’m now living in my bedroom. I’m not sure I can actually do this anymore.

2 Likes

Yes this is me exactly,I have gone to pieces,nothing left for me now that she has gone.I too live in my bedroom,I go there very early and watch rubbish on tv.I am not sure I can do this life anymore now.Michael x

I thought I was the only one that was feeling like this till I come to this site I to am lost I sit in a daze telly,s on but I’m not watching its just a noise in the corner when will this nightmare end. Just woke up to the feeling of dread another day to battle though . Why did this happen I can’t stand it I want to scream :tired_face: instead I just cry my eyes out oh Jim why did you go I need you here. I’m so alone now my life is over I will never get over this. I want to die

1 Like

So here we go on another day with the same feeling of dread and pain,I too would be happy just not to wake up one morning ,I also feel my life now is over without her by my side.Cruel world. Michael x