Hi, i lost my husband, soulmate, love of my life, best friend & my protecter on 29th May 2023. Aged just 54!
Im so broken! I tried to be with him again on sunday. Unfortunately the police found me, and i was still here!! I feel so guiltu on my children 38 & 32 & grandson 11. I cant explain how much i love them but felt theyd be better of without me being so broken!
I feel so guilty as i have support however, noone can help me. All i want is my husband & i cant cope without him. 
I am so sorry to hear of your husbands passing at such an early age.
Sorry that tou were so.low that you tried to take your own life. I know sometimes we cant talk to family or friends but their are other help lines Syd Ryder Cruise samaritans who can help or just listen to you. I am only 3 months since my husband passed away and yes there are bad days and some not so bad. I try to keep busy too but we all feel the loneliness of being on our own. Take time to go through all the feelings you have but ralking to someone does help. Rememer the memories you shared and the next part is to take time to look after yourself your husband would not have wanted you to be sad or unhappy but i know sometimes you will .
Please take care x
I am so sorry for your loss. You are in very early days, and with time, it will get more manageable for you. Your soulmate is still around you in spirit, and wants you to live your best life. Don’t let him down. You still have a beautiful life here to live on Earth and you should cherish every day that you have. You will meet him again in spirit one day. You can chat to Sue Ryder or Samaritans if you are in desperate need. You also say that you have have children and a grandson. Just think how heartbroken they would be if something happened to you too! They would feel the devastation and I’m sure you wouldn’t want that for them either. I know how so difficult it is, but maybe you can chat and find support with your children, they I am sure want to help you. Be kind to yourself. You matter in this world and you will begin to see a little light again in life soon. xxx
Thank you, xx
Thank you x
No one can help you but you. How you help yourself is hard, you have to walk through this grief.
I wanted to die because of the pain I was in but I couldn’t put this pain on anyone else. My partner was 49 and my normal every day life changed in an instant. It wasn’t expected and the shock is still with me. I’ll never understand why, I’ll never forget the love we shared or the life with him lost.
What keeps me alive, is not being 100% sure in what I believe. My partner was convinced that death was the end, nothing after, what if he’s right, I could kill myself for nothing because he won’t be anywhere. I don’t want to take the risk of ruining my children’s and grandchildren lives for nothing.
My partner would have lived his life, if roles had been reversed and he would be furious with me for wasting mine, he doesn’t get to live but I can and as hard as it is, I live and I hope to find happiness again.
There is help out there, and I implore you to find out because one day, if you allow it, you will find happiness again and you’ll be so glad you lived.
Right now, it’s shit! It’s all shit but eventually it will ease and like any trauma, you will learn to live with it and not be overcome by it. Recovering from trauma takes time. It can be done. You can have a life worth living, in time.
https://www.karensutton.co.uk/ have a look at this. It might be a start.
Well aaid @Ali29
It will take time to recover from the shock trauma and pain
Today i felt so bad only 3 months into this journey but yesterday felt better.
I only hope more days get easier i know he would want me to live my life the best i can without him. Take care x
I agree with everything you say. I am getting the help i need. Thank you x
I 100% agree! Im getting help. Thank you x
This website and podcast is extremely helpful. Karen herself is a widow which, I feel, makes her far more empathetic as a counsellor and she has a very positive view which I find encouraging.
I am so sorry for your loss & you felt so low.you tried to take your own life.it wasnt your time to die.you were meant to live on.l know Life feels like absolute crap right now.l get that & was where you are last November.l didnt really want to die.l just wanted the horrendous pain & loneliness to stop.l was in such a dark place.but l can assure you.life goes on & we do get through it.we have to be kind to ourselves & do whats right for you.Grief changes & there will be happy times again.Sending you love & light XXX
Thank you x
Thank you xx