meeting your soul mate

I lived in Bullwell Nottingham from birth to the age of 24 I used to visit my parents ,who had moved to Congleton in 1984.in 1991 I used go out with friends every Friday and Saturday evenings.whilst out with friends I met Jayne.dont really know what happened that evening.i just know we saw each other with friends for a few weeks.then we arranged see each other on our own.And on 24th may 1991 officially we became girlfriend and boy friend.Unfortunately I had sciatica and ended up having time off work and after 2 months at home being unable to stand,i was admitted to hospital.i spent 6 weeks in there,until I had a scan which revealed that my disc was ruptured.hence I had the option to have an operation.it was as easy choice ,yes the operation had risks but I couldn’t continue my life in constant pain.Jayne was great over this period of time and visited my every day after work and both afternoon and evenings at the weekend.
only 5 days after the operation I asked be released,told them wanted get home,in reality Jaynes company had a weekend party in the lake district to which Jayne wanted me go with her.i did and had have the seat as tilted as it would go as I shouldn’t of been sitting to long probably shouldn’t of gone,we had a great time all be I was still recovering from the operation.after 7 years of going out we moved in together,sadly Jaynes company had decided to uproot and move their company to Ailsbury.We both missed each other like crazy,Jayne stopped in an hotel for the first 16 months.eventually we got a rented flat in Newport pagnall.i used go down with Jayne occasionally.like all couples we had our ups and downs,but I always loved Jayne.she was everything a man could ever want in a lady.i wish we had children,but Jayne was very career minded and I suppose we were a tad selfish and wanted to just be us two and not have to share each other love with another.in 2007 as a couple we decided that I should look after the house cooking cleaning shopping etc etc.and Jayne would support us both.maybe this was the time Jaynes family decided to dislike me I dont know.we had lovely holidays in Britain,we went brixham at least 20 odd times over the years sometimes twice a year we went cornwall for a change and scarborough a couple of times to.always had such wonderful times.id do most of cooking and shopping .Jayne loved to just switch of and relax reading one of her kindles sitting on a chair on the beach.she had a demanding job which at times was rather stressfull so thats why switching off was so good for her life was great I was with my dream lady we could do what ever we wanted.Sadly in 2016 we had a letter stating a lump had been found in one of Jaynes breasts.After the biopsy taken we was told she had cancer.The lump was removed,Jayne had radiotherapy to this day I dont know why chemo was not given as well.we thought with having the radio therapy and operation and taking drugs which would have to be taken for the next 10 years that all was ok.on 10th may 2018 after a scan which only scanned her breast area was told it was clear.Jayne had sent a text stating she was given the all clear,well on 23rd jan after Jayne had issues with her legs and other issues I persuaded her go to the doctors hoping it was nothing major.the initial scan showed slight signs of cancer in her bones and kidney.after 2 weeks looking at ghe same scan was told the cancer was un treatable and after 1 and a half days in the east Cheshire hospice Jayne was gone.i was and im shocked and devastated to of lost my best friend lover and soul mate.such so that I made a complaint about the slap dash way Jayne and lots of cancer patients are treated.my complaint had a response ,one point id made was being given all clear ,was told Jayne wasn’t ,but that the breasts were clear of cancer I was told only Jaynes breast area was scanned.well what the hell .why would supposed professional doctors who understand the effects of cancer ,why when its known that secondary breast cancer can occur in the bones kidneys liver brain etc only scan the breasts.there is n o logical reason apart from cutting corners and giving patients and their partners and relatives false hope when stating cancer isnt were they had looked for it.well what ever crap I get given when I respond to their dodgy response I will take it further.as all cancer patients need to be given equal chance of early detection and this cannot be detected if they are not scanning the whole body of those who are being treated after a cancerous lump as been removed.
regards one very annoyed partner
I know that Jayne would not want others to have to be treated like she was .

Jayne looked after me with the expression of wish,i was living with my mum as I was forced from the home I shared with Jayne for 20 odd years.Jayne would love this little bungalow I got with Jaynes money.i desperately wanted to get the house id shared with Jayne,but Jaynes mum wouldn’t accept my offer or give me a counter offer.seems her sole aim in life is to show me as much distain and hatred as she can.this lady is a catholic and goes church regularly,not sure what the preachings are like at her church,or how a priest would react having a parishioner with not an ounce of compassion towards their daughters long term partner.im already as low as is possible without getting the urge at present to end all the pain im feeling.maybe that was this evil ladies aim to drive me to the point of no return.i hope if there is a afterlife of sorts I get to be with Jayne,nothing anyone says can ease the way I feel ,having read loads of posts in this forum there are lots as low as me with tragic circumstances driving them here to seek some form of support.hopefully lots of people are helped ,even if its only a little.suppose to some im just a sad individual who should be able to do whats best to move on.ive got no desire or drive,frankly im just existing and the future is looking bleak.im hoping try do things for charity in Jaynes name as she was my world and Jayne will always be in my heart soul and thoughts.

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Ian…
…rest assured, things will work out as it is meant to be in the end…I know, nothing in the world is ever going to bring back your Jane, same as for me, nothing is going to bring back my dear Richard of which i would give anything if that was a possibility and we were both healthy and living back at home in our house in Bedfordshire just like it once was, only this time freeze time as these were our best years…
Try not to dwell on the " Jane’s family " look after number one which is YOU, this is what your Jane would have wanted…prove your Jane right, that whatever you do now is in your Jane’s best interests…keep your Jnes interests firmly in your mind, do everything your Jane would have wanted you do do, to have done, do this for Jane and no one else, not for her family, leave them to do things their way and let you get on with yours and Jane’s way…Jane will be so very proud of you, and if and when her parents decide the rift is to be ended, all the better…I am in a similar situation, I am an outsider too in my Richards family, i am completely by myself and only have my Richards wishes at heart…

Jackie…Ian thank you for posting your update, i had been wondering how you are…keep strong, our God will guide you in the right direction…

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