meltdown moments

just had another wee meltdown thinking how much she would be enjoying the sunshine today. nearly 8 weeks and I’m missing her more and more. I hate this new life I’m enduring

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Keep going hun and scream and cry when you need to xx I’m always crying and I lost Martin 4 months ago x it’s crap I know x

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Me too…Fridays were our fave day…now it just heralds the start of another hard weekend…this is not a life…it’s an existence…love to all :slightly_frowning_face::heavy_heart_exclamation:

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It’s brutal trying to keep going, but somehow I’ve found myself still plodding. It’s 8 months since my husband Chris died and I cry everyday - I miss him so much.

I’ve just had a meltdown too. I was going to go for a walk during my lunch break and it hit me hard that I’ve no longer got my wonderful man to put sunscreen on the bits I can’t reach. Such a small thing but it brought me to my knees.

Hugs and wishing moments of calm to all xx

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Hi Bob
You have brought back memories for me of those meltdown moments.
Now being four years along this road they are more or less gone.
I can remember so well having one of those moments on our allotments, why, the damn mower wouldn’t work properly. I went down on my knees and screamed and cried in frustration. I also had one in B&Q when it suddenly hit me that he wasn’t outside in the car or at home. It was like someone had punched me in the stomach. I hid until I could stop sobbing. There were many more incidents in those early days though as we have to find an outlet for the grief… I often wonder if my neighbours ever heard we screaming into a cushion…
Take care, it will ease in time.

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I know for sure my neighbours have heard me! In some ways I want it to be easier and in others I feel so guilty that I might dishonour her memory by not being as upset. It’s still so raw.

Hi Bob
That rawness is so awful as well as the guilt we seem to carry with us. I don’t think there is anyway you will dishonour her memory in these early days. It will become easier when you are ready. I noticed that I was coping much better and I wasn’t such a mess but it was a slow process. You hardly notice it but it will happen.
Pat
xx

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@BobY . l mark my calendar with my melt down days, lm 6 months in, but l see no let up. just last week l had 2 days back to back. Does anyone know when this will get easier?

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Sorry @Lotswife there is no timescale where grief is concerned but it will get easier. It must be difficult for you being housebound and not able to go out and focus on other things, my thoughts are with you. I’m afraid 6 months is no time to be grieving and we have to be patient. Have you tried contacting Age Concern as they do sometimes arrange visits for people living alone.
xx

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