Its been 6 months (Jan 2022) and i miss him so much. We have a lovely family and friends, but im still so lonely. Been together since we were 17 and would have been celebrating our 50th in September. I try to stay strong in company, but break down when im alone. I wish he was still here with me, He was my best friend, soul mate. Did everything together and now i have nothing. Family and friends have their own lives and I woudnt want to be a burden. I dont know what i want anymore and lie on bed most of the days having no motivation.
Hello Madonna
I completely understand. Our situations are so similar. I’m at the 6 months ( Dec 2021). People keep telling me it is still early days, but they have no idea what I’m going through.
I was 17 when we met and married almost 52 years.
It is hard staying strong in company,and it is a lonely life, in spite of supportive, good family and friends.
I have to force myself to go out , and lack motivation in doing anything.
I am also feeling overwhelmed by the tasks piling up that my husband would have done.
Just do what feels right for you.
Sending love and hugs to you.
Anne
X
I so understand that position xx
Hello Madonna,
I’ve lost mine at the end of April. It’s already been nearly two months. Yesterday, 26th April, it was marking a month we’ve had his funeral. We did so much together in our 36 years of marriage, it was a wonderful adventure. Today, things are different. We lost our youngest child in January of 2017 to a rare cancer. We were just beginning to rebuild our lives.
Then Pandemic struck and the curtain of isolation was down with a thud. We had plans from July on this year, but now I’ve to fulfill this to-do list by myself. So far, the last item we bought together, a new clothesline, has been installed. Just wish daughter and I could use it a wee bit more but the weather hasn’t cooperated. It’s Scotland, so no surprises there.
Hopefully, I still have to find a way as to how I’ll be able to cut the grass mat for our wee sitting area. I’ve no idea what to use to cut that. Meh! The fence painting, I’ll tackle as I love painting outside and it’ll keep me busy.
Nevertheless, after all is said and done, the loneliness is engulfing. Saturdays are difficult now. There’s no other family than our lovely daughter, absolutely no friends in real life, just one of two online. It’s not the same as having a conversation with my better half. I miss his face, his smile, those gorgeous cornflower blue eyes and being able to kiss him and hug him as we did daily. That’s tough! Just discussing what to have for dinner.
Hopefully, in August, after the three dreadful months, I’ll get back to my writings, my eBooks and closing up accounts that he had online. The clothing is on that list as well. In the end, there’s no need to rush, there’s plenty of time, so take one day at a time. It took five years to recover from our son’s passing, I believe a lifetime for the lost of a soulmate. Bright blessings dear!
Its been a while since ive been on here and im still feeling the same. Except i find i get so frustrated with things around me. I got angry the other day (so not like me) and took it out on my friend/colleague, i felt absolutely awfiul and just cried. I really hate my self , im not the same person i was when my husband was with me. I keep thinking of stuff that we should be doing now, thinking about the plans we had for our retirement (which we never had). Why did he go so early? Why did he get Alzeimers so young when he was so fit and healthy, very rarely unwell? I lye in bed i think of these questions all the time and cry myself asleep. Its been 10 months already and feel i can’t go on. My family are ery good, my mum supports me ll the time. Why do I feel this way???