Missing him

I just lost my husband completely unexpectedl he came home from work went to bed got up in the night said he didn’t feel well so I stayed awake with him until about 5 am he calapsed on top of bed I thought he was messing around but he wasn’t I did cpr until paramedics explained he had gone 25 years together 2 grown up children youngest still at home 20 but I Sam okay when busy then I cry my eyes out I just don’t know what I’m going to do with myself feeling lost funeral on Wednesday dreading it watching him having that heart attack has destroyed me I just relied on him so much

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Short123 I feel your pain. I lost my soulmate of 35 years so suddenly at the end of July, he got up in the morning and after a while said he felt awful, I asked if I should call an ambulance and he declined, I rang 111, it was a Saturday morning and was waiting for them to get back to me when he had a massive heart attack. I struggle to get that vision out of my head.
I am gradually beginning to accept my loss, my daughters have been a fantastic support (they were not his children but loved him like a father).
The funeral was a blur, in fact the whole of this past 3+ months have been a blur, but I have made myself move forward, I go out most days and now have less time crying.
The truth is that we all cope in different ways, we all grieve in different ways, none is right or wrong but I honestly believe we all have it in us to get through these difficult times. I have accepted that my life will never be the same again, I still have days where I am really broken but I have to carry on through the pain for my daughters, grandchildren and great grandchildren. I’m dreading Christmas, I’m going to miss our normal Christmas, going to my daughters whereas we always spent Christmas at home but I guess that’s all a part of my new normality
Stay strong and you will get through this

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Hi @Short123 so sorry for your loss. It’s like being stuck in a nightmare isn’t it. I lost my husband 9 weeks ago, he passed very suddenly too. We were on holiday and he collapsed too and like you I thought he was messing around. It’s never easy losing a loved one but them passing abroad has been hell. One problem after another :broken_heart:
Sending you a hug.

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