Missing my mum

Hi, I have just signed up to this. Wasn’t sure where to go.
So in August this year I lost my mum, my best friend to cancer.
It was a 2 year battle we watched her go through. I thought she would make it but unfortunately it got the better of her when we was told she had 3 months. My world shattered.
We was by her side when she took her last breath which I wanted to be there for but I some days I replay how she was.
I know I spend as much time with her as I could but feel it wasn’t enough.
Since then I have had bad day and good days. I think the good weights out the bad as I just push my feelings aside. I am a happy outgoing person 90% of the time.
I don’t like to bother people with my grieve.
But really am not sure how to deal with my grieve. I know it’s all still so raw and just need some advice or to talk to someone in same position.
It was her birthday 7th December. First one in heaven so that has made me realise it’s all real and not a dream.
If anyone wants to chat am happy to.
Thanks for reading.

Hey. I lost my step mum to cancer in august. Shed been fighting for 7 years and went down hill very quickly. I have alot of the same feelings that i wasnt there enough. I was there for her final days but still feel like i should have done more

@Baba1 thank you for your message.
Am sorry for what you have gone through. It’s nice but not nice to know others have been through the same thing.
All we can do is support eachother.
Am sure your step mum knew you was there enough.
I know my mum would know I was there enough as I saw her twice a week. But if I knew the day she was going to die I would have spend the whole week before with her.
Hope you are finding ways to help the pain.
I thought I was but not 100% now.
Sometimes grieve doesn’t hit people straight away it comes and goes. Could be months or years and it hit us.

Keep strong. Here if you need to talk

Hi I thought I would reply as I am new to this also, I have just signed up as I lost my beautiful mum last week I’m so sorry you have lost yours too it really is the hardest pain to navigate I feel so lost and not sure what I should be doing from one day to the next, I can’t sleep or eat and so scared of what the future looks like, my mums passing was so sudden and unexpected I can’t understand any of it… always here for a chat I really need to try and find a way to deal with this especially for my 2 daughters

Big hugs xx


@Blondie9 thankyou i definately have days were its worse than others. My worst time was on the day we usually had our chats. Ive still got her on my speed dial and just cant bring myself to take her off. I feel what makes it worse i live so far away from my dad too i feel useless.
Im here if you need a chat too x

@Jogriffin i think mothers are the strongest people out there. Im not one myself but you all find a way to put others first and im sure youll find your way to supporting your daughters. But give yourself space to breath… she was your mum and nothing will ever change that

I am sorry for you loss and sending you much love :heart: 4 years ago my mom feel ill and went into hospital when she was being released the nurse said you just need to talk about your cancer before you go my mom did not know where to look. My baby sister (39) had to break the news to us it was like a train crash she was given 4 years with operations at 76 what an amazing woman the braves woman I know. Then lock down came she stayed at my sisters but time has robbed me of seeing my mom in those years two more operations removing overis and blades she final came home but with the news just before Christmas last year of 3 to 6 months my world came to a stop .I feel like I should have spent more time with my mom I feel like my life has been a very fast rollercoastaer ride then I spent her last day at her bedside I was not going to move she took her last breath at home in her own bed with us her children and her twin sister by her side. I feel like the rest of the world has move on but I am still sat by her bed holding her hand not wanting to let go. Then when I went back to work it was not me or my job it felt like I was in a different place and I could not understand what people were saying to me I have had to take more time of work. I see Christmas lights and songs everywhere I can’t breath I’m not in control I feel sad numb and alone but I’ve got people around me most of the time. I can’t watch TV as it full of death cancer and Christmas. So I find my self home alone and reaching out on here finding comfort with other people who are in the same situation. So I breath tell myself I’m ok and breath and take a step into my new journey with out my mom. My mom knew and told us it was only time make it count and use it well don’t waist it. Talk and breath one day at a time always here to listen if you want to chat :two_hearts: