My brother dave

I lost my bro 6th of May this year he lived wiv me for just over last year of his life.i never realised how bad he was through drink he always smiled and didn’t tell me. I feel so guilty and hate that I cudnt help.ive ad to go back to work but days for no reason I’m in absolute bits .I saw him collapse in my kitchen and ad to watch as he vomited huge amounts of blood .ambulance came pretty quick but died a week later I feel I’ve let him down and wish I cudve av helped how do I get out my really bad days luv Jo xxxx

HI joker dave47.I am so very sorry for your loss heartbreaking.I am a widow of 11 years my lovely only son who was a good support but also a drinker passed away in March.He stayed with me most of the time leading upto his sudden death.Dave its so very very hard to help somebody with drink or other addiction problems.Believe me I tried everything to help my boy but don’t you feel guilty it’s hard to to know whats going on and your brother obviously didn’t want to burden you.He lived with you so you did in fact do alot for him just by being there.I won’t say its easy not feeling guilty because even though I am telling you not to feel guilty I do and most bereaved family do feel guilty when losing somebody.It seems to be part of our grieving process.I can only say carry on cry when you need and know that you were and are a loving caring person.Marg x

Thank you so much as feel so alone thought I was doing a bit better then 4 no reason crashing back mum lives wiv me as well but she can’t do nothing as can’t walk has a commode but will not av a carer in to help I work full time.i ad to organise my dad’s funeral 2 years ago and then my daves I feel broken and lost luv Jo xxxxx

Gosh Jo my heart goes out to you.You have alot to cope with not easy I understand your loneliness.You need support for yourself .I don’t know if counselling may help I am on a waiting list.Am a bit unsure whether it will help but will have a go.Really all we want is our loved one back and we know that will never happen.Do try your best to have a bit of time just for you and my best wishes to you hugs Marg

Thanks marg 1 I’m still waiting 4 counseling for my dad all this bullshit we r helping people with mental health it’s gonna b just me myself and I luv Jo xxxx