My lovely dad passed away last week and I feel devastated. I’m in shock and feel numb . Can any one give any advice
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Hi Shahz,
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my dear old Dad too, suddenly, in January 2021. I remember the first week like it was yesterday. I cried lots and felt numb and guilty. I used to wake up and, for only a second, would forget that he’d died and go through all the pain again when I remembered. I lost weight. I stopped wearing makeup. I hated everyone else who still had their Dad. I snapped at my family. I felt lost and overwhelmed by the thought of having to sort a funeral etc. I dreaded calling everyone. I’d burst into tears in a shop if something reminded me of him. All of this is normal and gets better with time. You will get through this and are stronger than you think. Honestly…
Be kind to yourself and don’t try to do everything immediately. You need to process what has happened. And cry and cry… There is no right or wrong way to do this, just your way.
I still chat to my Dad but don’t always cry when I do anymore.
Sending you lots of love. 
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I could have write this. I’m feeling the same way. No make up, no intrest in my hair, today I had to go and buy my mum new clothes as most her clothes were too big for her and burst out crying in shops because I shoukd be buying clothes for her to wear when alive and not to Bury her in. When I wake in morning I open eyes and flooded with anxiety feel sick. Now I’m waiting to get to bed to just get rid of day and do it all again tomorrow.
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Hi @Shahz
I am very sorry for your loss.
You are in the very early stages of grief and everything you are feeling is normal.
I lost my Dad very suddenly after he fell and hit his head in January. My whole world crumbled and my heart smashed into a million pieces, I cried for days infact weeks and didn’t want to do anything. However I went back to work early on (after 9 days) and it was the best thing I could have done. Getting back into a routine really helped me, I am a teacher and seeing the boys everyday was exactly what I needed to help me forget my troubles for a few hours. I did take everything to heart a lot more and broke down a few times at work (which I never do) but my colleagues were so supportive especially my TA.
I have also found writing down my thoughts and feelings helps as well as reading some of the posts on here and helping where I can.
Keep reaching out and message me if I can help in anyway, we are all here to support each other.
Take each day as it comes and remember it is OK not to be OK (as my cousin keeps telling me)!
Take care of yourself,
Roisin
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Hi
I’m so sorry you’re going through this too. I lost my 53 year old dad 4 weeks ago today. I went home to visit and everything was lovely and normal, then he died very suddenly of a heart attack. He was my favourite person in the world and who I turned to for everything.
The only thing that keeps me going everyday is knowing that I was lucky enough to have had such an amazingly wonderful dad, and I know he gave me enough love and advice in my 27 years that I will carry with me the rest of my life.
I hate thinking about facing each day without him- it’s completely overwhelming. But I find talking about him and trying to live each day to make him proud helps.
There is no right way to try and navigate something like this but definitely keep reaching out and talking to people. Get support when you need it.
My dad was my complete role model, so I’m trying me best to be more like him and have him live on a little through me. I also find that having something of his with me is comforting. I found a necklace he gave me 20 years ago that was my first real piece of jewellery. It just about fits but I wear that now and although remembering him hurts like hell, I don’t want to forget a second of our time so I force myself to remember and feel grateful for each memory.
You’re stronger than you think. Life is so unfair and hurts so much, but you will keep going because you have to and they would want you too.
Sending love xxx
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Thankyou everyone for your kind thoughts they have really helped x