My Lovely Lady, Got Called Home

My Dear Den, got the call last week. As she left, she gave me the most precious of gifts, her SMILE, she knows just how much I used to love her SMILE, and that is exactly what she left me with.

As I held her ever so gently, she just slipped away. Den had fought a long hard battle of 3 cancers over 5 years, her poor body could take no more. In the end it was the chemo that she was certain that would save her, that killed her.
She fought to the last, My Den, was and is a True Hero.

But now I am desolated, Den was my life, she was all I had lived for.
I have now had people, ask me if I am still in remission, but they just do not seem to understand when I say ‘It doesn’t matter anymore’.

To me ,there is only one thing left for me to do, and that is to see that she gets the Farewell Service that she would have wanted. Saw the minister today, and planned just that.

After that, think I will just…

Dear Javron I am so very sorry to hear about Den.

I know just what you mean when you say ‘it doesn’t matter anymore’ I’ve felt like that about everything since my John passed away 5 months ago. After caring for someone you loved for such a long time life does seem bleak and empty. But the next few weeks will keep you busy.

I’m sure you will do Den proud with the Farewell Service you organise.

I hope do you find some comfort in knowing Den is at peace and not suffering anymore.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Libby

Oh Javron, I am so sorry to hear this news about your dear Den.

You have given her so much love and support over the years and were there for her right up to the end.

It sounds as though you will give her the farewell service that she would have wanted.

So many of our members say that you can only take things day by day - so perhaps just focusing on Den’s service is for the best for now.

Thinking of you.

Thanks Libby and Priscilla,

Went to our church yesterday to arrange the details for the Farewell Service. This was one of the things that we never really got to talk about, but I had picked up enough clues to enable me to plan. This is one of the things I did say to Den as she lay sleeping during her last few days at the Hospice, I told her what I planned to do for her, said I had a list of songs and hymns that she liked and told her what was on the list, but said she would have to trust me on this one, as there may be too many, also told her that we would sing Psalm 23, but to Stuart Townsend arrangement which she liked and her favourite PS 19.

Well she’s got them all (songs/hymns) all 6 of them. So that was good, then we talked catering, asking do I pay per person or just cover food costs, to be told neither, in another departure from the norm, I mean we already have an hours service, the minister said ‘No, this one is on the church’. Well, speechless.

So we have covered everything that Den liked, wonderful.

Then went to the Docs as they wanted to know when the funeral was, (they had already sent a card), so told them, and the practice manger said do you mind if some of the staff come? So said ‘Be fine, but how will that work during surgery hours?’ To be told, we’ll just block them out for the afternoon. Well, just fantastic, never expected that.

We must have been well liked. So what I thought would turn out to be a difficult day, turned out to be a very good one. I just feel so overwhelmed by peoples kindness and generosity.

What lovely gestures from so many people. They must all have liked and cared for Den a great deal, and for you as well.

Although you didn’t get the chance to talk to her about the service much, you knew her and knew the songs and hymns that she would like. It sounds as though it will be just what she would have wanted.

Hello Javron just to let you know I’m thinking of you and praying for you and Den. I know it’s difficult but do try and stay strong.
Libby x

Dear Javron, I was gutted to hear of the passing of your beautiful Den. I wanted you to know that you are being thought of very much and praying for you too. Your relationship is a credit to anyone with the love you both had for each other. Stay strong and I hope the service goes beautifully. Much love and try and stay strong.
Cookie xx

To all those following my Posts.

First of all, many thanks for your messages of support, as I know only too well some of you have already got the Tee Shirt!. It meant a lot.

The Farewell Service went well, too which I am glad, because you only get ONE chance at getting it right! It was had work doing it, but I was lucky to have had great support from the Pastors.

It was as I have said before, slightly difficult because I could not find myself able to broach the subject fully with Den, I am sure most of you can work out why. But I did manage to find out what she would like, song and readings wise, so we finished up with 5 plus Ps 23 sang to Stuart Townsends arr. I had no support from family on this, but in a way I am glad, because we had always done everything together, so it was only right that we did this together as well.

The service went well, which left me with just one thing, my Tribute to Den, I had been unable to read it out at home, without breaking out into tears, so just in case I sent a copy to Micheal our Pastor, so he could step in when required.

But he was not needed, Den gave me the strength to do it. I had decided to do my tribute slightly differently to the norm. I did it as ‘My last letter to Den’. So started it with ‘My Dearest Den’, with an appropriate finish, I then calmly (don’t know how I managed that), folded it up and placed it between my wreath and the casket. Apparently, I had some of the church in tears at that point.

So as Farewells go (Farewell, because we will meet again), yes it went well.

So once again, thank you for your support, not just for now, but also during ‘Our Journey’.

I will shortly write one more post, entitled as you can probably guess ‘The Final Chapter’.

Once again thanks

Ian

Dear Ian. I’ve been thinking and praying for you abd Den. So pleased the Farewell Service went well. I bet did Den proud. And she in return must’ve been so proud of you reading your letter out loud.

Even though Den’s body has gone her love remains with you, in your heart, your home and in everything you do; it will always surround you. You will meet again!

I can’t tell you things will get better soon, we just learn to survive and take one day at a time - It’s a different kind of life. I do feel the desperation, loneliness and anguish you are experiencing. Hope you have some supportive friends around you.
God Bless x

Dear Ian. I’ve been thinking and praying for you abd Den. So pleased the Farewell Service went well. I bet did Den proud. And she in return must’ve been so proud of you reading your letter out loud.

Even though Den’s body has gone her love remains with you, in your heart, your home and in everything you do; it will always surround you. You will meet again some day.

I can’t tell you things will get better soon, we just learn to survive and take one day at a time - It’s a different kind of life. I do feel the desperation, loneliness and anguish you are experiencing. Hope you have some supportive friends around you.
God Bless x

Well done, Ian, on putting together what sounds like a wonderful service, and reading out your letter to Den.

I hope you will consider continuing to post her and get support from our members. I have sent you an email, too, with a list of some other good sources of support.

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