Has anyone else noticed after losing a loved one your personality changes?
Im only asking because after losing my mum and dad I seem different, a lot less tolerant of people that upset me. I feel like nothing will ever hurt me like that again, and what I see as finally standing up for myself, my husband says at times I am not a nice person?
If I cry he looks up to the ceiling and has even said I should be over it by now? Normally I can cope with everyday life, but if anything upsets me I cry over wanting to see my mum and dad again. I think he thinks that I use them as an excuse but I don’t, I just keep it all under control until someone upsets me.
I can’t get over losing them both together, but it was only earlier this year. How long should I be heartbroken for? Is there a time span?
Some days I just want to be with them, it’s my children that keep me going.
Hi Candy1960,
No, there isn’t a set timeline for grief, and it is completely normal for you to still be feeling heartbroken. Especially as you have to deal with the loss of both parents.
Grief is not something that can be fixed, or that goes away completely, but, in time people find a way to live with their feelings and to move forward. Some research that Sue Ryder did found that this takes more than two years, on average - but it can vary a lot from person to person.
You might find it helpful to read this article, which talks about coping with grief as time passes:
How long does grief last?
I don’t think it is fair for your husband to say that you should be over it by now, and I am really sorry that he is not being more supportive. I don’t know if it would be helpful to show him that article to help him understand what you are going through?
I will try, and thank you