Well they do say it’s better to cry to get it all out but at the moment it’s a lot of tears from me and yourself and everyone on here
So sorry for your loss.i lost my husband to cancer January 2024 ,everyone on here understands what you are going through
1 Like
Thank you lucycat and I’m so sorry for your loss as well, yes I find it helps on here talking to people who are all in the same situation and having the same feelings
Can’t sleep tonight been lying here talking to Sammy wishing she was by the side of me 
I understand and empathize with your loss. I lost the love of my life just a few days before you lost yours. I’m so sorry. It is very hard and I struggle too and cry every day. I only know that the pain gets less over time (or easier to tolerate). Both of our futures have been completely changed. One piece of advice I’ve heard is try to set aside a time each day to grieve and try to grieve that part of the day. I"m not sure it helps. I don’t have a specific time of day but I do cry each day, sometimes several times. It’s not as bad when you spend time focusing on something else even if it’s work. Good luck.
1 Like
I’m glad being on this helps and I know exactly how you feel about wanting to be with him. But remember he would want you to live your life and it’s one way you can honor him -as hard as it is.
2 Likes
Knowing that my husband would want me to carry on is what keeps me going. In the 45 years we had together he was always wanting the best for me. Most of the disagreements we had were about trying to make things better for the other person. I’m holding tight to those memories.
2 Likes
My husband was exactly the same, he would make me do things out of my comfort zone.
1 Like
angGarry70
There are many people on this site who will help you understand you are not alone and everything you feel is being felt by others whether it be anger, loneliness. jealousy when you see other couples particularly when older than you, regret and depression.
My wife died unexpectedly on 30 January so everything is raw to us both. All I can say is live hour by hour and try not to think too far ahead. Try to look after yourself, eat as best you can and only do things you want to do and don’t beat yourself up if you do nothing and don’t make any hasty decisions.
2 Likes
I know where you coming from Gary everything is so raw at the moment and some days the slightest little thing sets me off, but we must try and stay strong and if you ever need a chat I’m here mate
2 Likes
How are you doing today, today has been a bad day for me, everything just seems to keep coming and hitting me.
The council tax office rang for my husband and I told her he passed away in November.
1 Like
#anggarry
Don’t feel guilty that you could have done more. My partner was in his 50’s too, and in A&E for something simple when he had a cardiac arrest. There were an army of drs & nurses who worked on him, and did an amazing job and brought him back round after 14 mins.
So for you to have done 18mins alone is incredible.
One by one my partners organs were shutting down, and then they all came back one by one. But when he came out the coma 10days later unfortunately his brain had been affected and he eventually deteriorated.
I feel grateful he was there when it happened- but with all the help the outcome was no different.
I hate mornings and nights too, it does slowly become more manageable - even if the pain doesn’t go away. Take care x
1 Like
Thanks for your kind words. I tried my best but it was his time.Sorry for your loss. I’m glad I joined this group i am receiving from people who understand take care
1 Like
My husband was 50 when he died of cancer in November.
I only had 4 weeks with him from the diagnosis because the hospital kept sending him home every time he had an appointment until it was too late.
22nd October we found out, 13th November we found out there was nothing they could do as it spread to fast and he passed away 10 days later
1 Like
i’m so sorry for your loss. Hopefully we all get some comfort knowing we are in similar situations. The loss of a partner is the hardest pain of all it’s unbearable
You never expect to be a widow at 51, my husband was a fit and healthy person who rarely caught a cold. When he was in the army I would worry if he would come home or not. I never expected to lose him 2 years later from cancer.
1 Like
I’m so sorry for your loss. Life can be cruel and unfair, we can only try to march on as our loved ones would want us to.
1 Like
I am so sorry for your loss, I lost my husband on 27th feb this year after 5 weeks of hell. I feel like I am unable to grieve at the moment as I’m slowly finding out more and more about him. He was so secretive that I didn’t even know his password to his phone so I cannot sort anything out as he did everything on that damn thing. I’m at a loss as what to do, the debt that he was in (I didn’t know) is mind blowing too. I’m so angry with him right now for leaving me to deal with all of this that I cannot get past this feeling!!
1 Like
That must be so difficult for you and I’m so sorry. If you’ve got any idea where debts and banking is then try and make contact with them. If there is a will or not will dictate how you proceed. Do not feel inclined to repay any debts at this stage because they will be frozen until the estate is sorted out. Sorry I can’t be more help as I don’t know the situation and wouldn’t suggest you share any information on here because it’s not secure. Make sure you look after yourself and you should find the way to sort things out on internet searches.
1 Like
I agree with what you said, don’t panic about anything, if you need any help with things like that then maybe contact someone who can help you for advice.
1 Like